Grief [E] From a large family that has begun losing members, this is my narrative of that process. |
Welcome to WdC from the "Newbie Welcome Wagon" Hi Karmagenie, This is a wonderful essay. The title is enigmatic and attention grabbing. It tells the reader very little about what the essay is actually about. They are intrigued and will begin to read right away to find out more. You introduce the topic with a brief discussion of how you view grief and explaining your family. This takes all the reader's attention and focuses it completely on the topic and the essay. They will read to the last word. You have written about your early life with your family and the death of your uncle. The reader is delighted with the look they get at you as a person as well as a writer. The length is perfect. You completely develop your topic without belaboring the issue and making the essay tedious. I did come across one structural issue that needs your attention: 1)You have neglected to either double space or indent between paragraphs. You should remember to consistently do this to keep your writing clear for your reader. You use an emotional style that is very appealing to the reader. Great job.
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