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Review #4764465
Viewing a review of:
 Not My Body Open in new Window. [ASR]
A woman is assisted by a ghost during an abusive relationship.
by BarbaricYawp Author Icon
Review of Not My Body  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hi BarbaricYawp,

This is a powerful, wonderful story. The tone is filled with fear and self doubt. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering if this woman will get out of her abusive marriage. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a woman who is in an abusive relationship and is being visited by a ghost who seems to have been in a similar situation. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. I did come across one structural issue that needs your attention:

1)You have neglected to either double space or indent between paragraphs. You should remember to consistently do this to keep your writing clear for your reader.

The story is consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.

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