leafless [E] a short poem |
Dear Anne Mitch , Here comes a poem with an expression that is unique and one I have not heard of before. To compare winter to the chemo of nature feels inspired, but hope it is not from the sadness of having to go through it. I feel there are some things that still could be played with, like moving the arms of that depicted tree down and replacing it with the tree's top, before the famous chemo line. I feel that would be how to show, as intended with the autumn season, the loss of leaves like hair. In this way, you'll have a more natural order of what you depict with these images that also act with personification. This owuld better demonstrate theme. You had a moment with the leaves struggling, as if to grow, in the fall. I find that tree's stop producing leaves before they turn color and fall. It is the oddest thing about fall how everything is dying and it is only preparing us for spring renewal. But the chemo reference could further show that renewal to overcome the 'cancer of fall?' Just riffing. It would be fun and easy to play around with that expression and see where metaphorically it could go, rather than a short write. Showing through personification a tree that is bare and cold feels apt. There's that touch of sensory in there, amid the few poetic devices shown. If older, it's limbs can dry out and fall off, especially if it's had lichen, which is a sort of moss. Just sitballing. Well, I'm glad I discovered this poem. Unique and interesting and like to see people stretch an expression into new arenas. I went on a jaunt in the search engine to find fall poems, since I'm feeling closer to that season now. Thanks for sharing. Sincerely, Brian WDC Angel Army Reviewer My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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