\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4775821
Review #4775821
Viewing a review of:
 The Warehouse & Trust. Open in new Window. [E]
/\ An odd & confusing story of mystery and friendship. [ Creative Writing Assignment. ]
by dyxe0ri Author Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings and welcome to writing.com!

Good grief, what an amusing story. It rolls along with dreary, realistic details that carry us through the kitchen sink drama with a combination of tongue in cheek and seriousness. We feel the tension rising as Janice and Lee deal with the guy bursting into their rooms, and honestly I think I’d be the one holding the skillet in that peculiar situation. I’d also be the one to toss both of those silly guys out of my rooms… in fact, I identify a whole ton with Janice: her irritability, her strange clothes, her attitude, and all the little characterizations you’ve described so well.

The tension goes up and up as we follow Lee along behind Tony through the seedy side of town to an old warehouse, where the worst possible sort of stuff might happen… only to be relieved comically when the surprise is revealed. I love how there’s potential for more afterwards: do Janice and Lee make up? Did Tony do a good deed of rescuing the “items” in question? This could be a fun little soap opera.

You have a great way of writing, drawing people’s characters with words showing their little foibles and how they look and interact. My reviews are a bit on the “fluffy” side, as I can usually never think of anything substantial to suggest for improvement. You can improve the formatting by using Size 4 Verdana font to create a more open and engaging reading experience. Other than that, this was quite an enjoyable read.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile* *HeartT*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4775821