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Review #4776356
Viewing a review of:
 Overwhelmed Open in new Window. [ASR]
free association
by Mindcrime Author Icon
Review of Overwhelmed  Open in new Window.
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Rated: ASR | (4.0)
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Happy Account Anniversary Mindcrime Author Icon,

Empty, dreaming, nostalgic poem that you describe as a free associated work, in which I find honesty, the writer coming out of hiding, and sharing thoughts unanswerable but begging for meaning. When denied truth, when one has fully divulged all that is complicated and perplexing about the meaning of life, you show how it's possible to become obsessed and stuck in this place.

This narrative approaches the questions and directs thoughts toward a specific person, someone they long to hold. The list of questions alone could make one feel overwhelmed. The part about the preacher, I could assign figuratively as one giving up on being an authority on something related to life and gives up trying to figure it out. The old man with the wand of magic could suggest there are no easy answers and all the wisdom won't help.

The last verse personifies dreams knocking at the door and walking away in despair, sounding like opportunity 'that knocks' and dreams ending in disappointment. It's a very raw poem that has some elements at work, like the compelling speaker who has my head spinning a bit. I sense frustration that leads to despair and eventual hopelessness, yet still asking if there's a chance for the two of them. The part about laying on the floor at looking at a windowless reality feels like jail, separated from all life, hence the plea to be together.

As a free associative train of notions, I'd think this could be developed further to tie together all the images, making them work with one another to express more fully the poet's vision, should it take root. The questions either are rhetorical and need no answer, or lend a purpose to your poem's theme. Of course, it's a good exercise just to get those words out there. In time, you might look back and see some of the value I've noted.

Thanks for sharing you words,

Brian
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and Angel Army Reviewer
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