Hi Chrys,


This is a wonderful chapter. The chapter opens with details of Parker's life. This takes all the reader's attention and focuses it completely on Parker and the chapter. They will read to the last word. This is a fantastic opening hook. The detail puts the reader all the way into the chapter. You have set up your main characters and plot very well for the reader. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The chapter is well paced. It moves fast enough to keep all the reader's attention, yet it moves slowly enough to allow the reader to easily follow what is going on in the chapter. I did come across a couple of structural issues that need your attention:


1)"he's back."-"he's" should begin with a capital letter.

2)"Cause ole' man O'Keefe shot him and I hung him.-This is a piece of dialogue and needs to end with quotation marks.

The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. Great job.