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Review #4779930
Viewing a review of:
 Aya Chaka ra da Open in new Window. [13+]
The mystical realm of Aethoria
by EmmySage Author Icon
Review of Aya Chaka ra da  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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Hi EmmySage,

This is a wonderful story. The tone is formal. It suits the story and plot very well. The reader is wondering if Rufus will find anything interesting as he explores. They will read to the last word to find out. In the story, a man explores the ancient Realm of Aethoria. The story is narrative as opposed to conflict based. This is rare in literature and very interesting. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characterization is fully developed and believable. The story concentrates on Rufus, and he comes across as a real person. There is no dialogue but it is not needed here. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. I did come across one structural issue that needs your attention:

1)you stumble-Should read "Rufus stumbles"

The story is consistent in terms of point of view and tense. You have accomplished a great deal in just a few words. Great job.

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