Bears [E] This story is one of several created while working near Yellowstone one summer. |
Hi NormaJean, This review comes with a huge thank you for reviewing my story. This is a fabulous story. The tone starts off formal but ends with shock and amusement. This grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering if where the camera was and if the couple will find it before they leave. They will read to the last word to find out. In the story, a couple camping in Yellowstone Park are in for a huge surprise. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. I did come across one structural issue that needs your attention: 1)Dealing with work and mail kept us busy so several days went by before we unloaded the camera.-There should be a comma after "busy". The story is consistent in terms of point of view and tense. You have accomplished a great deal in just a few words. Great job.
|