Hello, JACE,

Here is a review for your "Family Memories" , which "Read and Review" picked out for me.

Comments and Observations:

I like how you captured a sense of nostalgia with the form ottava rima. Its ABABABCC rhyme scheme has given the poem a reflective tone and harmony, adding to its success.

The images of photographs on a shelf and family outings evoke a warm sense of remembering. These images strengthen the theme of memory and family ties.

The line “hauntingly completes my journey's memories” has a slightly darker tone, or maybe some bittersweet nostalgia. This contrasts with the earlier sense of joy. I like this, too, since I like contrasts done so subtly.

I'm wondering if adding a few more specific moments could give a stronger effect. I mean something sensory, that is using the five senses--like some certain moments in life, the smell of a family meal or the sound of laughter--in addition to trips and vacations that you mentioned.

As to ""Hist'ry's past worth," isn't the meaning of the word "past" already included in history? Just saying...

I really applaud you for the form, which isn't that easy to fit words into, and you've done a great job with it. Also, I like the overall theme and the tone of this poem, as it reminded me of my own experiences with family.

Best wishes with your writing and everything else.



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .