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 Review #4796002 |
 | Halloween was Special for Lucy Grealy  [13+] A gifted writer and very intelligent but more than anything, Lucy wanted to look normal.  |
| (4.5)  HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"   First Impressions: As I was reading, I fervently hoped for a happy ending to this tragic tale, but it wasn’t to be. I was hoping along with the main character that this last operation would bring the anticipated change and that she would finally get to feel ‘normal’ any day of the year and not just on Halloween. The last couple of paragraphs came as a complete shock, and you did a good job building the tension but not giving anything away until then. The main character was very well developed and the readers immediately empathised with her. The first paragraph was a great hook because at first it seemed like she was ‘only’ suffering from stage fright, but you described in very vivid detail what the actual issue was in the second paragraph and the rest of the story. People can be cruel and I can imagine that there would have been those who laughed and pointed when they saw her, but it seemed like most of the voices that told her she was ugly were inside her own head. Those are the hardest to escape, and in the end, they got the better of her.  Suggestions: The story was well written and I only noticed a couple of small errors: As she sit on the porch You need “sat”, past tense. touched each readers heart There should be an apostrophe in “reader’s” to indicate possessive. rather than Disney film There seems to be a word missing, “than a Disney film”.  Final Thoughts: I loved the description when she went outside and walked down the steps into a heavy weeping mist. I could imagine that very well and thought it was an excellent way to describe that kind of weather. I also felt that it captured her state of mind at that time. This was a very sad story that was punctuated by hope that was shattered again and again. Especially the reason why she liked Halloween was heartbreaking. The main character was incredibly strong though all of this, being beaten down but refusing to give up, until it became too much. A very good story!  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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