This is a good story that is damaged by inconsistent formatting and a plethora of plus signs where the word and should be. I think you need to go back and make sure that your paragraphs are properly separated. The usual format on this sight is a extra space between the paragraphs rather than indents.though indents are fine so long as the end up in each paragraph. There are also a lot of typos. This might be well served if you read it aloud to try to force yourself to see the mistakes and correct them.

I do think you have a strong story and a surprisingly likeable character. It just needs better formatting.