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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4808007
Review #4808007
Viewing a review of:
 Activities entries Open in new Window. [13+]
Random topics.
by Angel bunny Easter eggs galore Author Icon
         Review for entry/chapter: "Gone to a Different Country" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings, Angelica!

I'm here for I Write 2025.

This was a creative and interesting read, quite conversational and casual, like we're talking to a friend who's sharing their brother's story. It's a "tell," for sure, highly narrated, but of course that's part of the fun of a fictional personal account. I get the feeling it's a brief summarization, almost like an idea hastily scribbled out for later development.

I might suggest writing it straight from the brother's point of view, perhaps in the form of journal entries. I haven't yet attempted a story via journal entries... (Wait, did I do something like that for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window. last year? Jeepers, I can't remember *Shock2* if I did I think it was inspired by Kiya - she's such a a brilliant writer...)

Anyway... Great story here with gadzooks of potential! You could make a NaNo novel out of it, or a novella, something that would be a great movie. In fact, it sounds more like a spy story than a straight up war story. Best of luck at the contest!

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 03/27/2025 @ 4:30pm EDT
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4808007