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Review #4809676
Viewing a review of:
 Weekly Poetry Challenge Five Open in new Window. [13+]
where I will store my weekly poetry challenge poems plus a few other related poems
by JCosmos Author Icon
         Review for entry/chapter: "There Once was a Rich Billionaire" Open in new Window.
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#4809676
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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Greetings, sir!

I'm here as a fellow member of the PPC5 challenge.

Oh boy, a limerick about him! Love it! We need more socially aware poetry, even if it's satirical. This brings us a snapshot of everyday life these days: "Augh! He did what?! Ok, what's on Netflix tonight?" Escapism is fuelled by endless sources of mindless entertainment: why do anything about the state of things when there's another episode to watch, another movie, another order awaiting from Amazon?

Now, as for the meter... You've overcounted the syllables at "Congress," and even I can tell it doesn't flow well. You have 7 syllables at the two interior rhyming lines, rather than the limerick form of 5-5. If you want you can just whack out the word "now" and it'll do fine. I have a history of ignoring the limerick rules; one of my lowest rated items here is a three verse limerick inspired by Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody *Pthb*

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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