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 Review #4816470 |
| (5.0)  HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"   First Impressions: This story didn’t end how I expected! Actually, it didn’t really end at all - the characters stepping through the door seemed more like the beginning of a completely different story. At first, I figured they would be two very opposite people who would start to argue when they found themselves in this setting before finding some common ground. But you actually wrote a very charming story with a certain amount of tension and awkward humour, and an eventual magical escape. There was a lot of chemistry between them, and they used playful banter to gradually soften their initial stiffness. This rapport, laced with light flirtation, kept the readers engaged while the plot progressed.  Suggestions: The story was very polished and I didn’t notice any technical errors. I’m guessing that there was a word limit for this challenge which might explain why the ending seemed a little rushed. It makes sense to end the story at that point or you’d ruin the mystery - what lies beyond that door isn’t really part of this tale. But the paragraph leading up to it could have been a bit more detailed to make the ending even more intriguing. There might be the option to save a hundred words or so earlier on in the story and use those to tell the readers more about what they saw, perhaps even give them a hint what it meant. Did they die as the elevator plummeted to the ground, and this is heaven? Did they cross into a different dimension as they climbed through the trapdoor? Or maybe you could show the characters’ reaction a little more.  Final Thoughts: This was a great read with likeable characters and an imaginative twist. It was a small tale with a big idea, that some kind of magic might be within our reach even in the most ordinary or irritating situation. In the end, "Seven" didn't just tell a story, it opened a door. It left the readers standing on the threshold of something bigger, wondering what’s out there, and whether, just maybe, they would step through too. A quiet, clever piece that lingers long after the last line.
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You responded to this review 05/16/2025 @ 7:57pm EDT