This week: It's only words... Edited by: Lilli 🧿 ☕ More Newsletters By This Editor
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It seems everything is AWESOME or AMAZING these days. (I am so guilty of using these, lol.) These two words, and others like them, have been overused to the point they don't mean much anymore. Replace them with better descriptors for more powerful writing.
This coffee is awesome.
vs.
This coffee has the most robust flavor.
But, let's just be honest here, in my book, coffee is awesome. |
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"Empty" words refer to Low Information Content (LIC) expressions. Here are some strategies to help you identify wordiness and decide whether, and how, to revise it. At times, you may choose to keep a sentence just as it is, even though there are more concise ways to express your idea: you might, for example, use repetition to emphasize a point or include a redundant pair of words to create a certain rhythm. What’s important is that you make a conscious choice.
Eliminate redundant pairs
When the first word in a pair has roughly the same meaning as the second, choose one.
Common examples of redundant pairs include: full and complete, each and every, hopes and dreams, whole entire, first and foremost, true and accurate, always and forever.
Example: For each and every book you purchase, you will receive a free bookmark.
Revision: For every book you purchase, you will receive a free bookmark.
Delete unnecessary qualifiers
Often we use qualifiers that really aren’t necessary to express our meaning (such as “really” in this sentence). By deleting unnecessary qualifiers, you can often eliminate one or two words per sentence. Tweaks like this may not seem like much, but they can add up.
Common qualifiers include: actually, really, basically, probably, very, definitely, somewhat, kind of, extremely, practically.
Example: Because a great many of the words in this sentence are basically unnecessary, it would really be a very good idea to edit somewhat for conciseness.
Revision: Because many of the words in this sentence are unnecessary, we should edit them.
Identify and reduce prepositional phrases
Overuse of prepositional phrases (which begin with words like “in,” “for,” “at,” “on,” “through,” and “over”) can make a sentence clunky and unclear. To locate this problem, circle the prepositions in your draft and see whether you can eliminate any prepositional phrases without losing your meaning. Sometimes the easiest way to revise a wordy sentence is to ask yourself “What do I really mean here?” and then write a new sentence; this approach can be more efficient than just tinkering with your existing sentence.
Example: The reason for the failure of the basketball team of the University of North Carolina in the Final Four game against the team from Kansas was that on that day and at that time, some players were frequently unable to rebound the ball.
Revision: UNC’s basketball team lost the Final Four game against Kansas because it could not consistently rebound the ball.
Locate and delete unnecessary modifiers
Sometimes the meaning of a word or phrase implies its modifier, making the modifier unnecessary.
Example: Do not try to anticipate in advance those events that will completely revolutionize society.
In this example, “anticipate” already implies that something is in advance, and “revolutionize” already implies that something will be completely changed.
Revision: Do not try to anticipate revolutionary events.
Think about your audience
When writing, you should always have your readers in mind and consider what they need to know. |
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