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Comedy: July 17, 2024 Issue [#12644]




 This week: How To Win a Pun War
  Edited by: Waltz Invictus Author IconMail Icon
                             More Newsletters By This Editor  Open in new Window.

Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

Of puns it has been said that those who most dislike them are those who are least able to utter them.
         —Edgar Allan Poe

Puns are the droppings of soaring wits.
         —Victor Hugo

The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked.
         —John Oliver



Word from our sponsor



Letter from the editor

It's inevitable. At some point, you'll casually mention to someone, "I'm hungry."

And they'll respond with: "Oh, you're Hungary? Would you like some Türkiye?"

Now, the sane, logical response to this would be to hit them with a thing, preferably a pillow or rotten fruit, but maybe a fist. Or to just walk away. But if you don't hit them with a thing, you gotta hit them with another pun.

"Only if it doesn't have too much Greece."

And, at that point, it's on. The Pun-ic War. What you may not realize is that there are rules of engagement, unwritten until now, when I'm writing them for your convenience.

First rule: those three statements have established a theme, and you have to stick with the theme. A good guess for this one would be "countries in Europe." (Türkiye is close enough to count.)

So, they might come back with, "How about a bowl of Chile?"

Okay, so your initial assumption can be broadened to "countries in general." But you've already got another bullet in your pun: "Only if you don't Sweden it too much."

Second rule: if you repeat a pun, you've lost, no matter who made the original pun. So they can't say "There's not much Greece in Chile."

Hopefully they don't break the second rule, and explain, "I'll just Russia to the store to get the ingredients."

"I don't know," you reply. "This is all very Sudan."

"Well, maybe my mom will do it. Alaska."

Third rule: if the theme does change, it can't radically change. In this case, we're still talking about geographical locations, which, to be fair, might have been the case in the first place. If they'd come back with a play on, say, star names or weather phenomena (e.g. "Are you Sirius?") they'd lose.

Otherwise, the winner is the one who thinks of the last pun fitting the theme or something closely related to the theme.

Loser picks up the Czech.


Editor's Picks

Some funnies for you:

 Mark From Receiving Open in new Window. [E]
Even the Death Star has a Shipping/Receiving Department, right?
by Fraught-With-Safety Author Icon


 Clumsy Joe Open in new Window. [E]
Poor Joe needs to find another career
by Prosperous Snow celebrating Author Icon


 
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Arguing When Open in new Window. [13+]
Earl and Beau disagree on when to put up holiday decorations.
by Teargen Author Icon


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Sunny Side Up Open in new Window. [E]
Personification of a sunny side up egg. First place PersonITfication Contest October 2016.
by Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon


A Journal Entry of a Pediatrician Open in new Window. [13+]
Third Prize Winner in a Journaling Contest by Laurencia.
by Dr Taher writes again! Author Icon


 
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Tiffany redux Open in new Window. [13+]
Contest entry. Use humor as a tension release.
by D. Reed Whittaker Author Icon


 
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The 12 Months of Christmas Open in new Window. [13+]
What if instead of 12 days ... Day 10, Christmas in July
by 🌖 HuntersMoon Author Icon

 
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Word from Writing.Com

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Don't forget to support our sponsor!

ASIN: 197380364X
Amazon's Price: $ 15.99


Ask & Answer

Last time, in "FauxtymologyOpen in new Window., I talked about making up our own word origins for fun (and sometimes pun).

Sum1's Home! Author Icon: Thank you for listing my small poem in your newsletter!

         Of course! Never let it be said that I don't cater to today's abbreviated attention spans.

So that's it for me for July! See you next month. Until then,

LAUGH ON!!!



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Word from our sponsor
ASIN: B085272J6B
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