Romance/Love
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If you know me at all, you know that my favorite definition of love comes from the Bible in 1 Cor 13:4-7. "Love is patient, love is kind..."
For me, love does not mean just saying something. It means doing something. As they say, actions speak louder than words. |
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Occasionally, we receive messages from reviewers that say, “Show, don’t tell. You need a few action verbs.” That is true for our writing, but it is also true for our lives, especially our love lives.
Perhaps mixed messages confuse men. Women say that we want to hear “I love you,” and we do enjoy having someone whisper those three little words to us. We also delight in being on the receiving end of actions that prove love. Many women would even forego hearing those words if their lovers would just offer more concrete proof. Spewing and flinging those magical words around only works if one’s performance backs them up. The words lose their magic when the evidence never materializes.
Statistics show that in the United States, abuse touches the lives of between 25 and 33% of women, depending on which study you believe. It affects even more women, because if we are not touched by inappropriate or aggressive behaviors ourselves, then we know someone who is in the throes of a physically or emotionally harmful relationship. In the majority of cases, the abuser utters the words, “I love you,” after verbally or physically debasing the one they proclaim to love. “Lifetime for Women” movies offer a constant reminder of this fact. Is it any wonder that we require more than words as proof of love and affection?
Showing love is easy, as any kid can prove. Just watch a child in engrossed in making something for his or her mother and you’ll quickly understand what is important. A little boy spends an hour gathering colorful weeds into a bouquet, which he presents with a smile on his face to the love of his four-year-old life – his Mom. A little girl worries over a picture, trying to achieve perfection. She titles it, “You are beooPretty,” and as she presents her masterpiece to her mom, she grins from ear to ear.
A grown man cannot expect to the get the same reaction from the object of his affection by picking a few weeds, but he should learn from the simplicity of the act. Kids do not spend weeks wondering what they can do to show Mom that they love her. They just instinctively act.
For most women, little things prove love, as their response to the spontaneous actions of their children demonstrates.
Bring home her favorite dinner after you discover what an exhausting workday she experienced.
Arrange to have your mother-in-law spend a week as a surprise. (This only works if she loves having Mom around. )
Load the dishwasher without being asked. In fact, perform any housekeeping chores or laundry tasks without being asked. Better still, decide that you will that you will take on some of the household chores permanently.
Let her sleep in on a Saturday, while you feed and occupy the kids.
Do something creative; write a poem just for her, or paint a picture.
Contrary to those water cooler discussions, pleasing a woman and demonstrating your love for her is not a difficult task. Women are not complex; any child will tell you that the simplest act can bring a woman to tears, as she grins from ear to ear.
Ladies, this works both ways. Although women are more prone, by nature, to think of tucking notes into her hubby’s briefcase, sometimes we need reminders too. Love is an equal opportunity adventure. What we cherish, we must also give.
Act now; the love of your life is waiting. (And, as usual, what works in real life, works in our writings.)
"Acts of Love"
Even a child is known by his actions, by whether his conduct is pure and right. Proverbs 20:11 NIV
Stay wide-awake in prayer. Most of all, love each other as if your life depended on it. Love makes up for practically anything. Be quick to give a meal to the hungry, a bed to the homeless—cheerfully. Be generous with the different things God gave you, passing them around so all get in on it. 1 Peter 4:12, the Message |
Saying the words, but actions and surprise tell even more.
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Watching her mother die, the writer remembers how her mother showed love.
Things that you do for me,
The little stuff that counts.
The flower you bring home,
The snuggling on the couch.
One of my favorite WDC poets. Here’s a man who shouts to the world about the love of his life. Even his blog introduction says, “My first poem was written when I was 54 years of age - a love poem to my wife Melody. I am still learning and growing as a poet and as a man.” | | Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1216075 by Not Available. |
From another of my favorite WDC poets. She captures what showing love is all about in the last line of this poem – giving it away. | | Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1261440 by Not Available. |
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As a guest editor, I do not have any questions or feedback to answer. I did enjoy sharing with you, though. |
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