  Drama
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"Backtrack, Stiky! Your information on adapting screenplays is all good, but what if I'm scriptwriting illiterate? The format confuses me, and that's a lot of dialogue!"
Yeah, I've realized that while tackling scripts. So I've decided to take a look at the actual process of writing a script. Some of the tips I found work for all types of dramatic writing, not just scripts.
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Let's face it. The centered text and thought of juggling camera angles in one's head can deter some people from writing a script. However, scriptwriting is like boxing. Some of the movements may seem contradictory to what moves you may normally make. Likewise, it also takes multiple rounds to get it done. In the end, though, the final outcome is very exhilirating. Scrciptwriting does have a hidden advantage, although that advantage is relative. What is it? You don't have to worry as much about how your words look, so to speak. Prose and poetry are meant to look pretty on the page. With scripts, some bluntness in depicting the action is okay.
Really? Is that so?
Yes, it is. With scripts, showing action requires you to show it in as few words as possible. After all, you're working with a pretty compact page limit (110-120 pages, depending on how long you are able to make the movie). This makes word choice and sentence formation critical. Sure, that might sound like an obvious point. However, diction and sentence formation in prose is a bit different than in sceenplays. To illustrate my point, I'll drag out one of my works in progress and present in prose and script forms.
The first difference between writing prose and writing scripts is the beginning. Let's take a look at the prose version of the opening scene.
Staring at the Technics mixer manual resting in my lap, I focused on one paragraph in an attempt to block out the bass spilling over from the chorus room. The paragraph on how to splice two songs looked familiar. I wondered how many times I had read those very words. On my fifth attempt, I realized this information was not going to stick. Sighing, I closed the manual and held it up.
"Anyone want this?" I asked.
"I'll take it," Joe muttered.
I got out of my chair and passed the booklet to the senior.
"Thanks, Leslie," he said.
"You're welcome," I replied. "Good luck slogging through that jargon."
A stifled chuckle followed me as I retreated to my seat. I plopped into the red hunk of plastic and tilted my back.
"Nervous?" Keith asked.
I shrugged my shoulder and rolled my head to look at the young trumpet player two chairs over. "It's an audition."
"Heh. I'd feel better about this if it was for, say, chair placement."
"Yeah. Unfortunately, our grades still depend on this."
At that, the door opened. I straightened up and looked at the doorway. Standing halfway over the threshold was our band teacher, Mister Resnik. He looked over at me and nodded.
"You're up, Leslie," he said.
"Good luck," someone remarked behind me.
I stood up and turned to face the other four people in the room. "Thanks."
With that, I made my way to the chorus room.
How would that scene read in a script? Let's take a look.
FADE IN:
INT. HIGH SCHOOL - AFTERNOON
Five teenagers sit in plastic chairs in a small room. On one side is a piano, and a chalkboard on wheels takes up another wall. Sitting closest to the door is LESLIE CORDOVA, 17, thin and brunette, holding a white booklet near her lap. Two seats away from her is KEITH, 16, medium height and build. Across from her is JOE, 18, stocky and somewhat tall. Two other TEENAGERS meander in the confined space.
LESLIE
[sighs and closes booklet]
Anyone want this?
JOE
I'll take it.
LESLIE gets out of her chair and hands JOE the booklet.
JOE (cont'd)
Thanks, Leslie.
LESLIE
You're welcome. Good luck slogging through all that jargon.
JOE chuckles, and Leslie goes back to her seat. Once seated, she tilts her head back.
KEITH
Nervous?
LESLIE
[rolls head to face KEITH and shrugs]
It's an audition.
KEITH
Heh. I'd feel better about this if it was for, say, chair placement.
LESLIE
Yeah. Unfortunately, our grades still depend on this.
The door opens to reveal MISTER PATRICK RESNIK, late 20s to early 30s, somewhat tall and of southeast Asian descent. Standing in the doorway, he nods at LESLIE.
PATRICK
You're up, Leslie.
TEENAGER (OS)
Good luck!
LESLIE
(stands up and faces the others)
Thanks.
She walks out the door.
As you can see, there are a few noticeable differences between the two versions when it comes to what is written and how it is written. The keys to effective development of scenes in scripts are brevity and building tension primarily through actions and dialogue. Notice also that there is no introspection in the script form. While films are made to be viewed from a first person perspective, it's easier to develop that through cinematography than through the script. You may also notice that the script uses slightly fewer words (218 compared to the prose version of 244). Those figures will vary from writer to writer, and they're not relevant to the development of any piece. I just bring them up to show the precision required when writing descriptions in a script.
So what types of pitfals should you avoid when writing descriptions in screenplays? Some are pretty obvious and apply to all forms of writing, such as avoiding choppiness/redundancy in sentences. An example of that would be "John fed the dog. John picked up the garbage." However, there are some that are less obvious.
 lengthy descriptions and expositions: When writing your descriptions, avoid writing lengthy paragraphs. Introducing a new scene may take up to seven relatively short sentences. However, all other action should be described in two sentences or less. Here's an example of a action that is too long.
The door opens to reveal MISTER PATRICK RESNIK, late 20s to early 30s, somewhat tall and of southeast Asian descent. Standing in the doorway, he nods at LESLIE. In turn, LESLIE casts a sideways glance at him. PATRICK smiles.
Remember to leave a little room for the actors to create the individual characters' responses to each other. After all, spontaneity between actors makes for some of the most revelatory moments in a movie/TV show. Likewise, if I had shown every detail of the room (the color of the walls, the precise placement of the piano, etc.), it would bore the readers and drive the potential art director(s) insane.
Another temptation to avoid is telling the characters' various backstories in the description of the scene. There's no space for such elaboration, it's not always relevant to the scene, and it can drag the pacing of the script. For example, I didn't state what instruments Joe, Keith and Leslie play. Though it is an audition, bringing up their instruments would make no sense, especially since the audition has nothing to do with their instruments.
impeding on legal rights: Simply put, avoid referencing something that is trademarked or copyrighted. In order to use the product or work in a movie, the rights would have to be purchased. In most cases, this can deplete your budget pretty quickly. Even if the price is right, the process to acquire the rights takes a lot of time, and time is money in the moviemaking business. To avoid this headache, simply say the character is drinking a soda or that there's hip-hop music in the background.
camera angles stealing the show: I've gotten some flack for this, but I'm going to say it again. As tempting as it is to write in camera angles and transitions, don't do it. Why not? It's primarily economical, namely saving you time and space. Seriously. It's not guaranteed that you will always be directing your script. so if your script ends up being directed by someone else, that person won't always agree with the scripted camera angles. Likewise, at least when you're seeking financing for your script, including camera angles in the work tends to create less than favorable impressions with the studio representatives or whoever might provide the funds to produce your script. And of course there is the issue of saving space in script. Now once the script is greenlighted, then you might have the opportunity to write a shooting script, which allows you to add in camera angles as you see fit. Still, don't get too attached to them. Odds are, they'll change somewhere down the road.
I hope this newsletter has given you some insight into the world of scripts. They are a bit of a mystery on the site, both in the writing and reviewing realms. Hopefully these hints about the form shed some light and prompt some of you to explore a new form. Even if it doesn't, maybe these hints will help your other writing endeavors. 
Until next time,
(sig by terryjroo) |
I have chosen some items on the site that help expand your knowledge of the movie world. These items range from articles to forums to quizzes that explore the numerous areas of moviemaking. And when you're done with that, I threw in some movie-related items that fulfill your entertainment needs.Have fun!
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I thought I had two comments, but one seemed to go M.I.A. I hate when that happens. Still, I did receive a meaty pair of questions. Why don't we have a gander?
From DRSmith  : I am not, nor have ever attempted anything remotely connected to screenplay writing, but found this riveting newsletter interesting and informative... whereby you've presented a vivid peek at an aspect of writing that most within the rank and file aspirants know is there, and perhaps can relate to, but few have experienced.
Thus, you've inspired a couple questions.
Do those who specialize in writing screenplays tend to create material from scratch, or are they more prone to browse any number of novels, novellas, and short stories of others, whereby once settled on a particular work, do they then proceed to work in unison with the author to create a screenplay/script of sorts based on that piece?
Are there forums in here hosting a group of such talented specialists who might be interested in looking at/working with such prose?
Thank you, and I truly look forward to more of your newsletters.
Greetings! I admit my experience with scriptwriting is minimal at best. However, my forays into it and learning about the moviemaking world in general have been fascinating indeed. Thus, I like to share what I've found with the site. Anyway, to answer your first question, there's no hard and fast rule as to what scriptwriters write. One thing you'll find particularly true with screenplays adapted from other source material is that several writers will be hired/fired for the project during the scriptwriting process (which can take years). On top of that, there are various degrees of involvement for the author of the original source material. This ranges from the author him or herself directing adapting the original material (such as Stephen King) to the author having nothing to do with the adaptation. And then there's the issue of acquiring the rights, but that's a separate newsletter issue altogether! That said, I'd be inclined to say that aspiring screenwriters tend to work on original material, if only because it cuts their legal legwork in half. That said, it amazes me how quickly they're churning out the Harry Potter adaptations. Maybe the Hollywood train needs to slow down. Now I'd really like to know how involved J.K. Rowling is in that mess, but that research endeavor ranks at spot #2785 on my to-do list.
As for your second question, I have yet to see a forum on this site devoted specifically to bringing together writers and those interested in adapting source material for the screen. As you said, it is a specialty, and it's a rather expensive one at that. I have yet to find an active forum for screenwriters in general, though. Maybe they're out there but not easily visible. If you happen to have a forum or plan to start one, let me know, and I'll feature it in my next newsletter.
Well, I got zero suggestions for movies, which is why I have a different topic for this newsletter than I intended. Still, I'd like to do a U-Pick Topic issue. That said, flood me with movie suggestions! Please? *pulls off best Puss 'n Boots impression* If I get no suggestions again, well, the next topic will be a big surprise for all of us. 
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Drama: October 17, 2007 Issue [#2012]
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