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If you're anything like me, you need humor to get you through the holidays. With all of the craziness that occurs during the months of November, December, and January, we all need a laugh break on a regular basis.
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Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Mary.
Mary who?
Mary Christmas!
Who, with confidence, actually knows what day of the week it is?
What about today’s date?
Did you think you had all of your Christmas shopping done; only to find out you forgot an incredibly important person on your list? Say, for example, someone like the mother-in-law who selflessly watches your children for you every day while you’re at work, free of charge?
Are you one of the millions of people who think it fun to leave early from your family’s Thanksgiving dinner to go stand in 20-degree weather outside of Best Buy overnight in order to get a new laptop computer for $250 (after a $1,000 mail-in rebate, of course)?
Why do we do these kinds of things to ourselves every holiday season? Isn’t the true meaning of giving in the actual act of giving, and not reflected in the act of tackling someone in order to get the last Hannah Montana doll at Toys ‘R’ Us so your daughter will squeal with glee on Christmas morning? Don’t we think that she would be just as happy with a $5 Barbie doll?
Should I forgive my neighbor for keeping me awake at night, since he is so full of the Christmas spirit that he’s decorated his house up brighter than an airport runway? Or the lady that put me in the emergency room as she trampled me to get to the last toy that her son was fanatical over? Or the guy that pushed me out of the way so he could be first in line at Sears?
This holiday season, we can’t forget to remember the important things. Sure, my mother-in-law might not get the most extravagant of gifts, since I thought I was done shopping and spent the rest of my present money on bingo night at the local VFW. She won’t be disappointed by the three-armed sweater I crocheted for her, since I put thought and time into it.
After all, it’s the thought that counts, and I thought of her as I was making the sweater, even if I wasn’t when I spent all of her present money on the hopes that I would be able to stand up and shout, “BINGO!” after the caller announced B-12.
And if you can’t even make your someone that you forgot a sweater, just tell them that you were going to buy them a Wii, but they were sold out. 
I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season. Next month I plan on featuring some love song parodies, so send me yours. If I like it, I may even give it an awardicon or you a merit badge, or maybe even both! |
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Comedy: December 12, 2007 Issue [#2117]
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