Comedy
This week: Grammer[sic] Edited by: Waltz Invictus More Newsletters By This Editor
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"I had thought - I had been told - that a 'funny' thing is a thing of a goodness. It isn't. Not ever is it funny to the person it happens to. Like that sheriff without his pants. The goodness is in the laughing itself. I grok it is a bravery... and a sharing... against pain and sorrow and defeat."
- Valentine Michael Smith
(Robert Heinlein,
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Grammer[sic]
We've all seen it, in posts and emails all over the internet. We can try as hard as we can to avoid, correct, and edit it, but it crops up everywhere.
We've all done it, try as we might to get it right.
It's funny enough when it's inadvertent, especially when committed by people (e.g. writers) who ought to know better.
I'm writing, of course, about grammar and spelling mistakes.
Waltz's First Law of the Internet: Any internet post correcting someone's grammar, spelling or punctuation has a significant chance of containing grammar, spelling or punctuation mistakes.
I don't know why it is, but next time, take a look at such a message: chances are, it will have at least one mistake. The longer the correcting message is, of course, the greater the chance of an error. And then there's the inherent problem with writing such posts: while sometimes it's meant as a courtesy, usually it's done to display some sort of intellectual superiority over the original poster.
Example:
Obama ruined the ecomony!
LOL ur an idiot. It's "economy," stupid.
First of all, do you really want to help your ideological opponents look less stupid in the future? And second, anyone who uses "ur" outside of texting (or scholarly discussions of history ) proves Waltz's First Law. No, in that particular case you would be better served explaining that in fact it was Bush who ruined the "ecomony," or, better yet, keep your fingers shut, since neither of you is going to convince the other.
As in most other things, though, as comedians we have an advantage over those poor, deprived souls who couldn't joke their way out of a paper bag: we can pass our mistakes off as intentional comedy.
And sometimes, it is intentional.
Rumor has it that once, the great statesman Winston Churchill was told that he should never end a sentence with a preposition - to which he supposedly replied, "This is the sort of bloody nonsense up with which I will not put." - or some variant thereof. It's unlikely that Churchill was the actual responder, however. As Abraham Lincoln once said, "Never trust an attribution you read on the internet." The witticism, regardless, stands as one of the greatest rebuttals to grammar Cylons ever (use of the term "nazi" for anyone who didn't perpetrate the Holocaust is rude).
Whoever actually said it doesn't matter. What matters, as usual, is that it's funny.
Thing is, even when coming from someone you know is a skilled writer, and intelligent, grammar mistakes make someone look ignorant. It's kind of the written equivalent of a Southern accent - it's hard to take anyone seriously who says "y'all." Yet there are millions of perfectly intelligent and well-read Southerners.
So, most of the time, we want to use proper spelling and grammar, so they don't call you a "looser." ("Looser than whom?" I generally respond.) Therefore, it is of great importance that we know, at least on a practical level, proper spelling and grammar.
That way, see, we can break such rules deliberately and to humorous effect.
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A few funnies. I didn't check to make sure they were grammatically correct, but most are October-themed:
and for some interactive fun:
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