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Because of a comment on a previous newsletter, I found a fabulous resource for fantasy authors. Limyaael has written what she calls "rants" on the various quirks of fantasy stories and the people who write them. She has kindly given her permission for me to quote from her rants directly. Anything in green is a direct quote. Otherwise, assume that I've added to it. The only editing I've done are minor paraphrasing due to Limyaael's non E-rated examples or words  .
The feature today is Limyaael's rant on the beginning of fantasy stories so onward we go!
Beginnings Rant
1) Paragraph of action or dialogue, then endless paragraphs of description/exposition. Say your story begins this way:
"Come here, Beldeira!" Syelli called softly. "I don't think that we should be heard, not if we don't want them to break our fingers."
I want to know what the world Syelli and Beldeira are doing, please. I do not want endless descriptions of the room they're standing in, how beautiful the characters are, what the view out the window is like, and this tapestry over here that displays how the Battle of Rockingroll was fought ten thousand years ago and won by King Avediwhoop. Drop in little bits of description and exposition as you go along, instead of piling them all at once. Nothing like that to bring the action to a screeching halt.
2) Starting out with an immediate scene designed to make us go "Awwww!". Characters usually have to earn my sympathy. Setting up a scene where the main character gets abused as a child, or scorned by other characters for nothing in particular is pure emotional manipulation. Case in point: See Mercedes Lackey's Magic's Pawn. The character Vanyel starts actually winning a fight, and is immediately beaten down, has his arm broken, and is scorned by all his siblings. The second chapter consists entirely of whining. Not a good idea.
Once the reader figures out that she's being emotionally manipulated, she's a lot less likely to be sympathetic. Also, another bad thing that this does is present the hero or heroine as a victim, and while it may be an easy ploy to gain attention, it's difficult to turn the character convincingly into a hero after that.
3) Starting out with a flashback in which the character caps her entire recent history. Yeah, right. Show us by later mentions in the story, please. For a good published example of this, see Lois McMaster Bujold's The Curse of Chalion. The character is first shown walking down a road, obviously in pain for what has happened in his past, but Bujold doesn't immediately go into a flashback on how the past was cruel and awful ohmygosh. She gives sketchy details first, telling us that Cazaril was a galley slave, and only later do we see how awful it was, when other characters who don't know the story ask. By that time, the reader's sympathy (or at least mine) is engaged for Cazaril, the way it isn't for a character who takes one step and immediately starts thinking about her nine brothers and sisters and how she has to slave for them.
4) Having a mythological prologue that doesn't have anything apparently to do with the following story. This was original (I think) when David Eddings did it, setting up legends that were to have relevance to his Quest Objects. Now it seems that every amateur fantasy author starts out with some kind of prophecy or myth of the gods. I do a checklist. Are the gods the main characters of the story? No? Start with the character, please. Is the writer good with mythological language? No (the answer most of the time?) Then stop trying to do something you're not good at. Is the writer using this as an infodump? Yes (as is true almost all the time?) Stop it. [Me now: I agree with this with a minor exception. If the quote from prophecy or whatever is not long, say a paragraph at the most, then I think it can add tastefully to your story.]
5) Having no discernible POV. This POV floats from character head to character head, or even describes things no character could possibly know, like how many times the moons have risen since the world began or how the sea has changed the shape of the land over thousands of years. Bo-ring. This has the problems of exposition multiplied, since there's not even a paragraph of dialogue or action to try and hook us. Some authors aim for a 'movie' approach, where first they come in like a camera on a castle or a scene, and then choose the character whose perception they share. I don't think this works very well, since if the techniques of books don't often translate to screen, the same is true in reverse. Movies are essentially dramatic media; they show you visual images, just as drama shows the actors, and they show you what the characters do and say rather than what's going on inside their heads. Books have to have some interiority, or it's really hard to relate, and the interiority needs to stay at least partially constant. I have read stories that bounce viewpoints every few paragraphs, or bounce between chapters and then never return to certain characters, and it's really, really annoying. I think many amateur fantasy authors try for multiple viewpoint characters thinking that's the way they have to write, because they're writing epics. However, most authors should probably wait until they've had some practice with single viewpoints and rooting themselves in them before they try for multiplicity.
-Limyaael
http://www.livejournal.com/userinfo.bml?user=limyaael |
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 This week's question: Do you have a favorite way to begin a story?
Previous question:
Are you doing anything special July 16? (Like a party at a bookstore, or simply reading all day, etc?)
From: faeriegirl25
On July 16, I will either spend the entire day (and night!) reading Harry Potter, or I will wait in desperate exasperation until my birthday, when I will recieve the book and proceed to devour it.
I hope your birthday isn't too far off! I don't think I'd be able to wait that long at all. (My birthday is in May  .)
From: Bmao  
I discovered a problem with the timeline, of the 6th book taking place in 1996. In the beginning of the 4th book, it was mentioned that Dudley got mad and chucked his Playstation out the window in a letter to Sirius Black, (Chapter 1, pg 25) and they did not exist back in 1994. I'm hoping the 1996 was a typo, because I remember the first book came out in 1997, and a more logical timeline would be sometime between 2001-2006.
Plus, it wouldn't make sense the timeline of the 6th book be 1996, because it was mentioned that Dumbledore was famous for defeating Grindelwald in 1945, and from the information from Riddle's diary back in 2nd year (1993), Dumbledore was a charm's teacher 50 years ago (1943), so that would create holes in the timeline. Just an observation.
-Bmao
You're not the only reader who has noticed that JKR's timelines have a few inconsistencies. She has admitted that arithmatic is not her strongest suit so timelines are a lot of guesswork for fans. The timeline I used came from the Lexicon, which uses only Rowling's own words to confirm facts about dates, people, and other facts about the Harry Potter world: http://www.hp-lexicon.org/timeline.html . On the lower half of that page you'll see that Rowling officially OK-ed the Lexicon timeline so 1996 for book 6 is correct (the Playstation is a typo, rather than the date). Harry was born July 31, 1980 so he would have been 11 in 1991, when the first book starts.
From: billwilcox
Moria,
A fine newsletter about Mr. Potter. We have all the books and I'm sure my kids will want this one too. Thanks for the info,
W.D.
No problem, Bill! I got the book on Saturday and I finished it by the end of the day (not without a headache for reading so much though!  )
From: Strange Wulf
For the question of the week:
I don't really have anything planned myself, but my sister works at B. Dalton's and they're having a little party. They'll be showing all three movies there to celebrate. I might show up, just to see what's up. =P If I can get up early enough that is. Curse me nocturnal tendencies...
LOL. I wish I had some "nocturnal tendencies." I was so tired Friday night on the 15th that I decided not to go to the midnight release. I ended up buying the book the next morning around 10 am. Of course I finished the book sometime that evening so I guess it all balances out  .
From: dusktildawn
Question of the week ... are you doing anything special on July 16th?
You bet! It's my birthday and the start of my happy, happy, summer holidays!
Happy Belated Birthday!    
From: me_is_me
Special things I'll do on July 16.....no, nothing special. I will be READING!!!
Woohoo!
From: submariner
Thank you for he insight to the new book. Although I won't be hanging out at the local bookstore, I do plan on picking up my copy and begin reading it with my son. So far we have read each story together.
How fun! My brother and I had initially agreed to read it together, but then he went out of town and I had it all to myself for couple of days!
From: Lady Haggis is back, finally
My Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is arriving on the 16th (from Amazon!), and I think I'll be doing the same thing I did last year: Reading the entire book in one day! Then I'll call up all my friends who did the same thing, and we'll laugh, cry, argue, and go over the entire book in detail, then despair over how they'll destroy the movie. (My precious third book! Oh how they killed you!) That will be my wonderful 16th.
Oh dear. I could say so many things right now, but I won't spoil the book for those that haven't read it! I hope that the next movie is more faithful to the books, though I can't imagine how they're going to pull it off since book 4 was so long.
rose_shadow
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Fantasy: July 27, 2005 Issue [#518]
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