Short Stories
This week: A Post-Script on Impostor Syndrome Edited by: Jay's debut novel is out now! More Newsletters By This Editor
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This month's issue:
A Post-Script on Impostor Syndrome
Some thoughts on last month's topic in follow-up: squelching self-doubts.
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So, last we spoke, I was preparing to swallow my impostor syndrome whole and head out into the wild world of writer's workshops. Now, three weeks after I've gotten home, I'm still chewing on a lot of the information I took in while I was there. Initially I had planned to write about how reading for critique differs from reading for pleasure, especially when workshopping a manuscript in a critical way. I'll come back to that at some point. It turns out that a lot of my week on Martha's Vineyard absolutely hinged on issues of self-judgment, impostor syndrome, and, actually, some more ideas on how to keep that feeling down.
I spent the week of the workshop reading, writing, and critiquing alongside 23 other talented individuals with a broad range of lived experiences. It was eye-opening to meet so many other people who all have this one same thing in common. All of us on this same road together... And yet so many of us stuck in our own heads as writers. To know that there really are so many people who can and do understand you can be hard to picture online. Seeing it in real time reinforced the importance of understanding how many other people are in this adventure together.
Solitude is an occupational hazard of writers. We need our headspace to build and destroy, so to speak. It's very easy to imagine yourself in a world where the writer existence is monkish and penitent. The Internet can make this feeling better, but seeing the successes of others can make the long slow process of writing feel as though we're not working fast enough or hard enough because we're caught up in what other people are doing instead of watching the word counts on our own documents.
It turns out that impostor syndrome comes along for the ride, when it comes to career stuff. It doesn't go away just because you start to see success. If anything, it morphs and grows along with the rest of your career. You might still feel inadequate even as you start to make sales and see success as a writer. (Awesome, right? Yeah, sounds super enjoyable to me too.)
BUT! One of the other things to keep in mind, when you get that twang of sale envy when you see someone else sell a story or hit another milestone: every story an editor buys is actually good news for you, even when it doesn't feel that way, because writing markets rely on the stories they buy in order to sell more magazines or anthologies... It's an ecosystem that no one writer can hope to conquer alone.
We are all in this adventure together.
Until next time,
Take care and Write on!
~jay |
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From "Good Enough" last month:
MacTíre Taibhse
GhostWolf writes:
I enjoy this newsletter as it is always a great combination of an essay about writing and a great list of short stories to check out- new favorite pieces and authors to find! The editorial essay about your experience with the dreaded Impostor Syndrome was spot on this week. I never knew there was a name for my debilitating lack of confidence- not only in my writing sphere, but my academic one as well. The more someone tells me that I am doing something right, that I know what I am talking about, I dig my heels in- convinced that I know nothing and soon everyone else will be able to see that too. Thank you for your advice on how to get past that situation. I think it is something we will all battle- it will never go away, but it will get easier and someday, it will be funny to us, instead of a sore spot.
I know this feeling SO well. Thank you for sharing your experience-- we are most definitely not alone in this and it's really important to remember how many of us are feeling this strain.
dragonwoman writes:
What is good? To me it's like what is normal? Each person decides what is good. I'm not sure you should compare yourself to others. I always try not to. The only thing I do try to do is to write better than my last piece every time I write something.
Oh, I think it's good NOT to compare ourselves-- just that it is very often something which crops up and makes writer life more complicated.
Cubby writes:
I belong to a writing group made up entirely of members who write for... adults. I am the only one who writes in the children's genre. They are a great bunch, but sometimes I feel like I don't belong at the same table. Their level is so different than mine in many ways. And when I read my manuscripts out loud, I'm almost embarrassed, lol. I haven't been going recently, but instead stay home and work on my writing. I know I shouldn't compare myself to them, but it's hard not to. Thanks for a great newsletter, Jay!
It's tough to find a group that makes us feel like we're on the right path sometimes, so I can understand that!
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