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This week: What's Okay? Edited by: THANKFUL SONALI back on Jan 4  
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| I've answered the question several times in the last few months -- 'are you okay?' -- and the responses when I answered 'yes' set me thinking. |
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Hallo Folks!
I've been struggling with some issues with my eyes lately, and have, thus, often been asked the question 'are you okay?' by concerned friends and family.
My usual response is 'yes'.
To that, I get a relieved rejoinder -- 'Oh, eyes fine then? Able to read normally again?'
The answer to that is 'no'.
My eyes are not back where they were before, far from it, but I'm okay. I've adapted, my Dad and my close friends are helping out, as are doctors, colleagues and acquaintances, even strangers, and I'm okay.
The thing is, if the conversation continues, the 'asker' expresses surprise that I've said I'm okay if, in fact, I'm not back where I was before surgery. I have to then explain that I can be okay even if the world is a little more blurred than it was before, even if I can't read the way I used to, even if I need help ascending and descending staircases.
The writer in me got to thinking.
Okay is a small word, yet it has different definitions for different people. Definitions that vary widely. So I threw open the question to my fellow writers on Writing Dot Com. "What does OKAY mean to you?"
What emerged was:
1. 'Okay' means different things to different people.
2. The context matters. Is it being asked because
a. The 'askee' has just had a problem that the asker knows about, and the asker is concerned?
b. The asker is an attendant at a restaurant or shop, and the askee is a customer?
c. They are meeting casually and have nothing else to talk about?
d. Either of them is an authority figure over the other in some way, and the context requires this question?
e. (And a whole lot of other reasons.)
And the response? The response YES could be seen as:
1. Yes, I am okay.
a. I have overcome my problem and I'm okay.
b. I didn't have a problem to start with.
c. I don't need an attendant to help me / the attendant has already helped me satisfactorily.
d. The world is fine.
2. I'm definitely not okay, but I'd just rather not talk about it.
3. Keep your nose out of my business.
4. Ask me more, I need to talk. / Don't ask me more, let's change the subject.
5. (And a whole lot of other interpretations.)
I'm not sure what the 'no' response means. Probably the opposite of the 'yes' response above, but then again, maybe not. Maybe it has its own nuances and shades and hues.
Here's a bit more of the discussion: "Note:
Details: "If someone asks if you are ok...", thank you Writing.Com Support  !
Another interesting thing is -- why is the asker asking? Is the asker, in fact, looking to become the askee? (I'm asking you because actually I'm not okay and I want to talk about it, so I'm hoping you'll ask me the same question back.)
All this is really exciting for a writer. Imagine the possibilities. Scenarios in which the asker and askee are in agreement about the question, the context and the answer, and scenarios in which they are not. The possibilities for the progress of relationships and of the plot.
So you could have your protagonist and a supporting character (or antagonist) have an exchange on being okay -- or not okay, and various interpretations of this. Try it, in your piece itself, or as an exercise in knowing your characters.
And when in doubt, remember what 🌖 HuntersMoon  says:
OK is the platypus of words  . Just like the platypus, it doesn't wonder what it is.
Write On, Okay? 
- Sonali
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See various writers discuss 'okay' here:
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Thanks for the responses to "For Authors Newsletter (May 18, 2016)" !
Steev the Friction Wizurd 
A long time ago I did some painting and thoroughly enjoyed it. I still like to draw. Great newsletter!
Vaughan Jones - ONE Scribe
Thank you. Very interesting in that I am 62 and I could do with some new creative "thing" to try.
Gaia Heap
Great newsletter. Hope your eyes get better soon. That was smart of your doctor to talk you into taking a therapy class. I think you really hit on something there with the whole try something new thing. US older folk (35+ here) tend to get stuck in our ways. Part of the reason I am here in WDC is to do just that. I have never written anything substantially or on a regular basis before. I still have yet to write my first short story. Reading what you wrote here will help. Paint and Write On!
Joy 
Good to have you back in the NL world, Sonali. Trying something I've never done before made me think. It's always exciting to step into new ventures regardless of the outcome. Happy painting/writing!
GaelicQueen 
Good article, Sonali, it often takes a change of venue (a place, a technique or activity) to realize you can still create vistas with different skills you didn't know were in your tool box. Hope you recover quickly from what's ailing you. |
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For Authors: August 10, 2016 Issue [#7792]
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