Drama
This week: On Whispers and Secrets Edited by: NaNoKit More Newsletters By This Editor
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Gossip. Rumours. Trust. Secrets. People talk, people share... but sharing can lead to drama. Then again, sometimes so can silence.
This week's Drama Newsletter, then, is all about secrets, trust, and whispers...
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Have you ever spoken about someone behind their back, in an unflattering manner? Have you ever found out that people said something unpleasant to someone else about you? Have you ever passed on someone’s secrets? Has someone passed on yours? Someone you trusted?
It’s not nice, is it? But it happens. We want to trust others, and we want to be trustworthy. But sometimes we cannot keep people’s secrets to ourselves, for one reason or another. So, we pass them on to someone we trust, and they might pass them on to someone else they trust, and on it goes.
“Have you heard? But don’t tell anyone!”
It means that when we share a secret of our down, we can hope that it stays with that person. We can never be certain, though. We cannot know where it’ll end up.
Communication is key aspect of being human. Each and every day, we gather a large amount of information and whilst we process it, there are things we just have to share. Some of these things are important to pass on: the road is blocked, so you need to take another route; a friend needs to go to the doctor, and someone needs to babysit their child; we’re out of washing powder, which means that the next time one of us goes to the shop...
It is also natural to share those things that happened to us that day. All of life’s ups and downs, big and small. That’s a part of maintaining our connections. It’s also a part of the processing and filing that happens in our brain. It’s a way to share our joys. Vent a little, where necessary. It’s healthy. It helps us deal with our lives, get through our lives.
Likewise, others share things with us, and some of that’s okay to pass on. Your friends’ daughter or son has graduated. Someone’s car broke down the other day. All events that aren’t private, aren’t too personal.
But then, there are the secrets. Most people have some. There are some things that I don’t think I have ever told anyone. And there are some things that only very few people know. They’re not overly shocking secrets, I suppose. It’s just that some events in my past I prefer to keep to myself.
I certainly have thoughts about other people that I won’t share with them. There is no need to upset them unnecessarily. Sometimes, yes, I do share one of those thoughts with someone else. The other day I saw someone tweet something about a mutual friend, and I thought it was mean and petty, and I expressed my feelings to a friend of mine who I trust not to tell the tweeter what I thought of her comment. It’s not nice of me, but at that moment in time I needed to unburden. I knew that if I had confronted the tweeter, there would have been a lot of drama. She’s not one to have a little heart-to-heart with.
I know, though, that gossip can be destructive. I know that there are those who make fun of others behind their backs. There is a line, somewhere, that’s not that easy to define but I think that most people know where it is. A random comment of “why did he/she do that” is, I hope, different to being nasty about someone, and especially being nasty about someone on a regular basis.
I have kept many a secret that other people shared with me, but I confess to having let a couple of them slip, and to having shared one secret deliberately. That secret was shared with me by someone who was in deep trouble, that they couldn’t see a way out of, and I was unable to help them. It weighed heavily on my mind, as I knew that someone had to do something. In the end, I shared it with someone who I knew would be able to help. Although the person in trouble was somewhat ticked off with me, it was worth it. Her life is a lot better now.
The couple I let slip were a case of genuinely forgetting after a long time that they were secrets rather that common knowledge. I have no excuse there. They literally just came out in casual conversation. Like, “Oh yeah, I remember when A. did this and that.” “Ummm... I never knew she’d done that...” Argh.
As it is with people, so it is with characters. A lot of drama can occur because of gossiping, malicious or otherwise. Because of secrets spilled. Or, indeed, secrets kept. Sometimes secrets can be revealed without anyone saying a anything. People’s words, and people’s silence, and be meaningful.
NaNoKit
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