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Spiritual: June 14, 2017 Issue [#8340]

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Spiritual


 This week: The Trouble With Assumptions
  Edited by: NaNoKit Author IconMail Icon
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Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

Being kind is good. Unasked-for help can cause more trouble than it solves, however...

This week's Spiritual Newsletter is all about assumptions and good intentions that can stir up a lot of trouble for those on the receiving end.

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Letter from the editor

I have written quite a bit in this newsletter about treating people with respect and kindness. That includes respecting other people’s faiths/beliefs/spiritual paths, and extending kindness to those who may well have very different religious and spiritual views than you do.

Sadly, some people’s kindness can cause problems. One place I worked at had mostly Christian employees, and some who didn’t talk about their faith. There was also one Muslim employee. At the beginning of Ramadan, one lady warned everyone she happened upon to not eat around the gentleman and to, if at all possible, not drink anything around the gentleman either, because it might offend him and anyway, it would make his fasting much more difficult if we were to stuff ourselves in front of him. She was the kind of person you didn’t want to cross – always eager to drag people onto the manager’s mat – so the poor gentleman, who was used to company during lunch, suddenly found himself alone, wondering what he’d done wrong. When he discovered what had happened, he felt deeply embarrassed. He didn’t want for people to stop eating and drinking around him. He much preferred the company of others. His fasting, he said, was something personal between him and Allah. Nobody else need be affected by it. The lady’s good intentions, then, only led to awkward sentiments all around. Luckily, everything was back to normal the next day, when everyone came together once more.

But the effects of well-intentioned actions on behalf of others can have more serious consequences. They can lead to truly negative feelings. For example, a school in the UK decided to ban pork products to be more inclusive, thus triggering negative media reports, despite Muslim parents not having asked for any such gesture to be made. The outrage stirred up can make people view Muslim members of society in a bad light through no fault of their own. The same goes for schools deciding to serve halal meat only, thereby causing division rather than inclusion, as some cannot eat halal meat due to their own religious beliefs, or general beliefs.

There was a nativity play that was changed so as to make people of other faiths feel more included. Again, this was done without consulting the parents of other faiths, who actually didn’t mind the original play – some of them quite liked it. Again, outrage in the media. Again, a feeling amongst the wider population of members of non-Christian faiths making attempts to displace it. It is sad, and damaging, because far from helping everyone get along, these small actions combined can lead to an ever-widening gap between different members of a community.

During my school years I studied with people of many different faiths and beliefs. My primary school was a Christian one, yet the students of other faiths didn’t mind colouring in pictures of Jesus, or singing Christian songs. And despite it being a Christian school we found it fascinating to learn about other religions, and religious festivals and celebrations. There wasn’t any tension nor any divide. We simply knew that people can have different views and beliefs, and that that’s okay! We didn’t need any action to be taken to be inclusive, because we already were.

My suggestion, then, if you want to be kind to people of other faiths, is to just ask. Or to not assume that any help is required - most likely, if there is a problem, the people affected will let you or the relevant people know about it. It is Ramadan right now, and those who are fasting are likely to be fine. They'll have fasted before, and they know what they are doing. However, if you feel that you have a genuine reason for concern, you can always politely approach someone and ask if there is anything they need. For example, if you are thinking of hosting an event at work and you are worrying about whether or not anyone might feel excluded, a kind approach and a true interest in someone's experience is far preferable to not going with theme A because such-and-such might be offended, whilst that person might well have enjoyed theme A far more than the held-instead theme B.

It is much more helpful to do that than to assume. Than to act upon the perceived needs of someone rather than their actual needs. That doesn’t just go for followers of Islam, but the followers of any faith or religion or spiritual path nor, indeed, should any assumptions be made about atheists or agnostics.

It should also be kept in mind that within a faith people will follow their own paths. So the needs and views of one person of a certain faith may not be the needs or views of another member of that same faith. That is why an open dialogue can be helpful. The more that we learn about the other, the more understanding it creates.

Wishing you a week full of inspiration and kindness,

NaNoKit Author Icon




Editor's Picks

Some contests that might inspire you:

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Spiritual Fiction Writing Contest-CLOSED Open in new Window. (13+)
a spiritual fiction short story contest - a 2017 Quill Nominee
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Write From the Heart - Story Contest Open in new Window. (E)
Write a story that pulls on the heartstrings based on the given prompt.
#2121278 by Purple Princess Author IconMail Icon


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Create a character using personality traits from a Zodiac sign.
#2115893 by GeminiGem🐾 Author IconMail Icon


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The Dialogue 500 Open in new Window. (18+)
Dialogues of 500 words or less.
#941862 by W.D.Wilcox Author IconMail Icon


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Elizabeth's Poetry & Short Story Contest Open in new Window. (13+)
Open for November POETRY submissions.
#2113830 by ElizabethHayes-DaughterofIAM Author IconMail Icon


And don't forget:

 
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Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest Open in new Window. (ASR)
Use the quote provided to write a story and win big prizes!
#1207944 by Writing.Com Support Author IconMail Icon

 
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The Spiritual Newsletter Team welcomes any and all questions, suggestions, thoughts and feedback, so please don't hesitate to write in! *Smile*

Wishing you a week filled with inspiration,

The Spiritual Newsletter Team



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