Spiritual
This week: Is Humility Always a Virtue? Edited by: NaNoKit More Newsletters By This Editor
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One shouldn't make other people feel inferior, but can being too humble be unhelpful?
This week's Spiritual Newsletter is all about humility and pride.
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Humility is often seen as a virtue. Instead of bragging about our achievements and successes, we ought to be humble. Instead of thinking that we know everything, we must accept the limits of our knowledge and our understanding. The Bible advises humility. For example:
Luke 14:11: For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.
Colossians 3:12: Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
Ephesians 4:2: Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
James 4:6: But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”
It is, no doubt, wiser to accept that none of us is perfect. If we accept our limitations, we can avoid subjecting ourselves to unrealistic expectations. If we accept that others are not perfect, either, we can avoid placing unrealistic expectations on them, and be more forgiving – up to a certain extent, of course, because we do not have to accept bad treatment.
If we accept our limitations, we also open ourselves up to further learning. As writers, for example, winning one contest does not mean that we ought to stop developing our skills. Even those authors who have published an entire series of bestselling novels are still learning, still growing, still experimenting. If there were an author who declared themselves to be the be-all and end-all of writing, I would definitely raise an eyebrow in their direction.
Is it always bad to show pride, though? I don’t think so. I believe that there is a time and a place for everything. If you have studied hard and graduated from high school and/or university, if you have worked hard on a project and are witnessing its success, if your poem or story or novel has won a prize or got published, it’s only natural to reflect on your achievements, feel pride, and accept people’s compliments. You have earned it. So long as you don’t use those accomplishments to make other people feel bad about themselves, there’s no harm in enjoying that moment in the spotlight.
Sometimes, too much humility can even cause harm. I don’t know about you, dear reader, but I find it very difficult to promote myself and my skills. That makes job interviews a rather unpleasant experience. Whilst others talk confidently of their achievements, it makes me cringe to do so. And whilst those other people smoothly highlight how well they’d do if they were hired, I think about all my flaws and deficiencies. Who’s more likely to get the job? That’s right. It’s not me.
You can come across badly in general if you don’t accept the occasional compliment or praise. Recently, I won an award and I was that stunned that I babbled on about how I was completely certain another person would win it. In hindsight, my babbling won’t have been very nice for that other person as, that time around, at least, they didn’t win. I should have been more gracious in my acceptance of the award.
And most people give compliments out of kindness and/or a genuine pride in other people’s accomplishments. Those compliments come from a good place. To brush them off is to brush off something good in others. That is something I will have to work on, and I know I am not the only one.
I think that, as always, there is a balance to be found here. It is, obviously, not good to be boastful and to treat other people as though they are inferior. It’s not good to believe yourself to be perfect, to stop being open to learning, and to stop being open to other people’s opinions. But it’s also not good to place yourself in such a lowly position that it eats away at your sense of self-worth. Everyone has value. Everyone has worth. There will be times in your life when you do something good, even great, and when that happens, cherish it. Allow others to cherish it with you.
I guess it’s okay to feel proud, when it’s merited. We just have to avoid becoming prideful.
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