through the eyes of a killer

-Death At First Sight-

In September of 2005 I met a woman named Sophia... Sophia Barridail. I had met her one day when I crashed into her at Barnes & Nobles, a book store I went to freaquently. I was carrying a very large amount of books and when i wasn't looking I just bumped right into her, dropping all my books to the ground. We both rushed down emediately to gather them and bumped heads when we reached for the same book. We laughed at our clumsiness and introduced ourselves as she helped me take my books to the cash register to pay. She invited me over to the cafe inside the store and I quickly accepted. I set my books on a chair and ordered a cup of coffee and we began to talk. She was amazing. She liked the same books as me, same movies, she thought the same, she even had the same job as me! And that's all it took.

After we finished coffee, she invited me to her place. So we both got in our cars, and I followed her to her house. When we got there, I was breathless. Her home was huge! I walked to her side and complimented her house, and she smiled. Apparently her father was in business and when he had passed on, she had inherited a large sum of money, so she quickly spent it all on this outrageously big house.
when we walked into her house, I was even more amazed. Everything was so clean and new! Her walls were a dark wood that was carefully waxed over, giving ig that extra special look. The air smelled of insense that filled my lungs with warmth. This place was magnificent. After giving me a tour of the downstairs, she lead me up a winding staircase to the next floor. She quickly swept by all of the rooms and lead me to a small bedroom... her bedroom. As any guy would, I got the impression that she was going to get dirty but I didn't say anything and did my best to avoid this image in my mind. She slipped over her sweater, revealing a small tank top making her kickin' curves look even better. She pulled her long brown hair out of the bun she had it in and let it drop down past her shoulders into a messy, yet attractive style. She sat beside me on her bed and my heart began to race. God She was beautiful. I couldn't stop staring! She stared at me with her big brown eyes and leaned towards me, pressing her lips softly against mine. I was smitten. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her closer to me into a deeper kiss. I let my tongue glide across her lips and slowly pulled her down with me, so we were both laying on the bed.

I began to pull her shirt up from her back but, as I did that she pulled away and glared at me. What did I do?

"What were you trying to do?" she asked.
This had to be some kind of joke i thought. There's no way she could've seriously thought I'd think anything else after she took me into her bedroom.
"Well...I thought...um" I stammered. What the hell was i s'pose to say? 'oh gee, i thought we were gonna fuck'. No...I knew she must've been playing games with me, so i tried to be as polite about it as i could.

"Oh I'm sorry Sophia...I just thought...well...you know"
'real smooth' i thought to myself.

"Go on, say it." She snapped back.

My patience had began to run out as I glared at her, trying my best to show her how much i wasn't enjoying this. I wanted to get laid, I was past the point of waiting.
"You know what I want, Sophia" I said, and I reached out to grab her arm.
She pulled away.
I was starting to get angry now, this was ridiculous.
"Why did u bring me here like this, and kiss me then?" I asked, almost demandingly.
"I just thought u were a nice guy" she replied.
"you've got to be fucking kidding me!" I started.
"No girl in their right mind brings a man to their bedroom because they're a 'nice guy'. Is this all just a game to you?"
I was really angry now and I grabbed her arm again and forced her against the bed. She screamed but i ignored her. I wasn't going to play games, I wanted sex and i was going to get it wether she was willing or not. I began to un do her pants when she got one of her legs lose and kicked my face. I screamed in agony as she wormed her way from beneath me and ran away.
"SHIT!" I screamed and ran after her.
I caught up with her at the stairwell and grabbed for her as she was taking her step down the first stair, but I missed her arm and she fell forward head first down the stairs. She screamed and then there was an eery silence. I knew she was dead...but I didn't want to think so. I ran down after her, calling her name and begging her to wake up. She remained lifeless. I began to cry as I stared at her limp body laying there. I murdered her.

I pulled myself together, and carried her up her stairs into her bedroom. I laid her in her bed under her covers and made her as decent as possible before I left. I didn't want to leave her the way she was. After taking one last look at her I quickly went out of her house and got in my car, speeding out of the driveway and straight home.

I thought this whole thing was done, but no. When I got home, their were police waiting for me. I knew right away what an ass I was when i remembered I had left my wallet in her bedroom. I was fucked. That's also when i found out that she wasn't 28 like she said, but 17. So that was statutory rape right there. She had also lied about living alone... she lived with her father. She wasn't lying about him being in business and rich though...I know this because he was my boss.


-Jealousy Can Drive You Mad-


I've often been told that I should rot in hell for what I did. They said murdering my best friend is worse than murdering just anyone...and it really pisses me off. They don't know what happen! Everyone just knows what was printed in the press, which is basically "This little fucker decided to kill his best friend". Sometimes I wish that was true, that the story behind it wasn't real...because I bet that would be better than knowing that my best friend was really a dick.
You see, I had this girlfriend named Kate who I had been going out with for almost two years and my friend Jake had the biggest crush on her. I personally didn't mind, as long as he kept his hands off of her it was all good. Kate was my everything. She had pulled me through some tough times and I (at the time) thought i was extremely lucky to have her.
One night we all went out to this bar that we hung out at all the time and sat in our usual booth in the back corner. That night was different though, because in the past few days I had become suspicious of Kate and Jake...They were acting...awkward (to put it nicely). See, i'm not a jealous guy but any person gets jealous when they notice their girlfriend or boyfriend hanging out with your best friend more than you. She had blown me off like ten times that month, saying that he "needed support". My opinion? That story was a pile of shit.
So anyway, they began flirting...a lot and i became almost invisible to the two of them. I just took one drink after another, watching them through shades of jealousy. To tell you the truth, I have no idea what was going through my mind at the time but all of a sudden I suggested we play hiding-go-seek. I had to repeat myself once or twice, but when they finally heard me they agreed reluctantly. We grabbed our stuff and went to the park across the street to play. As quick as anything, they voted me seeker and ran off together... and I'm sure if it wasn't for the alcohol, I would've been well prepared for the outcome of it.
I began counting... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10...ready or not here i come! I clumsily took my hands off my eyes and stumbled back and forth as I began to look for them.
"oh Kate! Jake! Where are you fuckers?" I yelled.
I must've sounded like i was on multiple drugs while yelling this, but it didn't cross my intoxicated mind..just like it didn't cross my mind that they weren't planning on being found after I had searched for well over 30 minutes.
Finally after I had threw up behind one of the park benches I gave up and started walking to my house, which was a few blocks from the park. I dragged myself along the sidewalk until I got to Mr. Baldwin's garden. If I could count how many times I had made out in that garden, i'd make it to the hundreds. It could've been in the 200's if i didn't get caught this one time with my ex girlfriend Lacey. Mr. Baldwin caught us and I almost shit myself. Luckily, he told me if i painted his front door he wouldn't press charges for going on his property.
Anyway; back to the point. I had stopped in front of his yard, because I saw two people behind Mr. Baldwin's rose bush completely undressed. Being I found this quiet humorous, I got a little closer to see who the two people were so if i knew them i could crack on them big time tomorrow morning. As I approached them though...It became painfully clear who the couple was. It was Kate and Jake.
"What the fuck is going on here!?" I screamed in the most slurred tone, I could barely understand myself.
Kate gasped and began to cry as Jake quickly grabbed his clothes to hide his nakedness. I could tell by the look on Jake's face that he was completely guilt ridden, and i really wish I had given him time to explain...because I knew Jake...he wouldn't commit something like this with out persuasion...this was probably Kate's idea.
In a jealous rage I ran towards Jake and smashed him in the face as hard as i could with my fist.
"You fucker! How dare you get with my girl!"
I continually kicked him and punched him, making him bleed and bruise all over. I just couldn't stop, i was out of control. It wasn't until I realized Kate had ran off that I stopped and looked around to notice the cop lights shining all around Mr. Baldwin's yard. That was also when I realized I had just killed my best friend.
So now i'm here in this sorry excuse for a jail cell on death row. Still think I should rot in hell?