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This is a place where I can tell my fears, fantasies and all my realities to the world. |
| A place to talk about my life and my current feelings without having to reveal them to anyone personally. |
| Well it has been a very trying month that is for sure. I have been remodeling my new home and it seems like it will never end. Finish one thing and you have to start another thing because it just doesn't work the way you want it. Not only were my new hardwood floors delayed, my new fridge I bought doesn't fit. After cutting the counter to make it fit the cabinets are in the way....sooooo here I go removing it and now it still doesn't fit.....take a closer look and "I'll be damned if that wall isn't straight". Yes there is a big bend in the wall.....Frickin Great, Now WHAT???? Well, now i'm looking at remodeling the kitchen, which I was not going to do for awhile...... I've been so wrapped up in my house that there is only 5 days left till Christmas, and I haven't even started yet... My kids told me last night that it doesn’t seem like Christmas because we don't have a tree. I almost cried. I'm the person who has the tree starting December 1st, I hang thousands of lights and decorations all over my yard and house, I play Christmas songs......this year.....nothing!!! I did hang a wreath above my garage at my new house. That is all I have done. My 8 year old daughter wrote Santa a letter explaining what was going on with the new house and moving and that she would be very grateful if he could drop off all her and her brother and sisters presents at grandma's house cause that's where she will be......I was touched and thankful at the same time that she understood what was going on...... As this crazy month continues I’m sure I will have lots to post……if not then I will be back to vent and say I survived… |
| Well if all goes well I will recieve the keys to my new house November 25th. I really haven't gotten excited about it yet. I guess I will once it becomes a reality. My lender keeps telling me that this IS happening, but I just can't believe it. My first house......and I did it with no ones help. GOD IT FEELS GOOD. I've worked so hard to get to this point. Now that I have accomplished the top 3 goals on my list (fix credit, new car, new house) now I have to figure out some more goals. I probably will not be working on any more goals this year because there is a lot on my plate right now. Not only will I be busy packing and moving, thanksgiving and christmas, I also have a kid getting her tonsils out around the same time. I remember when I got mine out. I feel for her, hopefully it will do her good like it did me. I will update as often as I can. |
| Well after almost a year of “Taking a Giant Leap Forward,” I am happy to say that as of October 5, 2005 I am officially D-I-V-O-R-C-E-D. YESSSSS!!!!!! I thought it would never happen, now to go on to my other goals, eternal happiness with myself and my life. Next goal on my list is to purchase my own house. (That might be a little bit harder than the other goals I have but once I accomplish that then I can accomplish anything!!! -well it seems to be the right attitude for now.) As for love, it’s on the back burner for now. I am completely content with my children and loving them and receiving their love in return. Right now I have NO interest in men (sexually and non-sexually). I have done my share of dating and realize that the men that I dated have NO goals or ambitions (except to get laid). I have goals and I plan on setting and accomplishing them!!! I’m done putting my life on hold for someone else. It seems that friends are more encouraging when it comes to my goals than anyone else. If it weren’t for my friends, who knows where I would be. I’ve lived my life bending over backwards making others happy and not worrying or caring about myself, well………it’s my time!!!! I’m ready to take care of myself now. I will still be there for my kids every step of the way as I’m sure my kids will be there for me cheering me on watching me do something for myself for once and not worry what anyone else will say. I will be back to update my progress with my new and improved life. Thank you for all your support. |
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