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by Coyote Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ · Monologue · Experience · #1027369
Customer service issue inspired to pen after reading a similar line by Rebus.
I was in here a while back and talked to one of you fellers about returning a grill.

Ok, Sir that is not a problem. Do you have your receipt and I will be happy to take care of your exchange.

I don’t have my receipt.

Sir, if you don’t have your receipt, I can not take your grill back.

The other manager said I could. I bought it here back in May. It was one of the ones you had on sale and you are the only ones around here who sell this kind of grill.

(Alright. This guy is full of it. We are not the only ones who carry that brand of grill in the metro and the only time we had grills on sale was in July.) Sir, if you can produce your receipt, I will be happy to take care of this for you. Unfortunately, I can not facilitate a return without it.

Damn it mister, I told you I don’t have my receipt and you will take this grill back. It’s out there in the back of my pickup. I went the other day and bought $200.00 worth of steakes. I went in the house to get a beer, I came back out and my grill was burning at 700 degrees.

(Boy, we get deeper and deeper with our deceit. At 700 degrees he should be bringing me back a pile of molten metal with a propane tank attached to it. Not a fully functional grill.) Sir, I am sorry your meat ended up over cooked, but I just cannot take a return past 90 days without proof of purchase from our store. In other words Sir, I need your receipt.

I don’t save my receipts on anything! I want my $400.00 back today!

I truly apologize for the inconvenience Sir, but without a receipt showing original purchase from our company I can not just give you $400.00.

This is a crock of shit! You just lost a good customer! I have spent over $5,000 in this store since you opened and I will not be back!

(Odd. I have been working here since before this store opened and I have never seen you before today. Talk about a crock of shit. I wonder whose backyard you stole that grill from.) I am truly sorry Sir, but I think it is time for you to leave. You will not talk to me in such a manner. So there is the door and you have a wonderful day!

What did you say to me?

I said have a great day!

… I turned around to see several other customers looking on in complete disbelief. I am not sure if it was because I would not just give this man $400.00 or because they could not believe he was so stubborn, ignorant and about to start swinging at me (which was crossing my mind.) I also noticed several of my associates strategically located to back me in case it ended in that. Needless to say I was very apologetic to my customers who had to witness the altercation and in the back room I praised my guys and gals for backing me up.
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