Consuming Perplexity

You cannot run with the hare and hunt with the hounds.

Consuming perplexity. An unfamiliar existence, a conspicuous absence. A cocoon that gently twines around me, wrapping its warmth yet limiting my freedom. A trap. An infinite darkness that lures, could I unknowingly be calling myself? Addicted to freedom, longing for affection, distrusting love. A walking paradox. Imperious emotions, precarious reality. What are we, why do we destroy ourselves?

You want. I wanted. We had. You conquered. But you left me. You left me alone, wanting. You returned. A fleeting stranger. You wanted more. I wanted. But I conquered. I left you, alone, on the world. I flew above your world, above the world we once held in our hands.

We want what we don’t have. We want what others want. It drives us. The consumption of tomorrow. Expectations, excitement, surreal anticipation. It is our fuel, it burns our heart and keeps us alive. The cold air of a new day, the fever of it ending, the taste of forbidden fruit, the pace of an exotic dance.

Want presides over us, but only can we see it, when the capacity for wanting is destroyed and then reborn, wanting what we had before.