It's Always The Quiet Ones

You hated storms… he had for almost as long as he remembered…

He fought to keep his car on the road in the wild storm; it was worse than the weatherwoman had predicted. He stifled a yawn as he pulled to a stop in the small garage and pulled the keys from the ignition. More yawns escaped accompanied his whimpers as thunder crashed loudly, the sound echoing through the little garage. Huddling under his jacket, he walked quickly inside, starting at every thunderclap. As he stepped inside, he knew something wasn’t right.

“Tatsuha?” He called softly, eyes wandering to the clothes strewn across the loungeroom. The two pairs of jeans, shirts, jackets and boots.

“No…” He whispered. “Not… not today…”

Maybe it was a figment of his imagination… there was hope, right?

You turned; his movements were stiff and robotic as he crossed the house, stopping outside the closed bedroom door. Slowly his hand reached for the knob and turned it. He pushed the door open and stood starting in the doorway at the sight before him. The flashes of lightning illuminated the two naked men, moving in tandem on the bed, their moans being drowned out by loud crashes of thunder. A single tear ran down You’s face as he pulled the door closed quietly and walked into the loungeroom.

“No more… I can’t… not again… not today…” He paced back and forth, his arms wrapped around himself, the moans of his lover and his lover repeating in his mind.

A flash of lightning, flashes of memories. It wasn’t the first time, You knew that, but stupidly he’d just hoped it was a once off when he saw the tell tale hickey on Tatsuha’s neck, the scratch marks that weren’t You’s.

Another flash of lightning, a clap of thunder, the gleam of a knife from the kitchen, terrified screams from Tatsuha’s lover… Blood arced through the air, so much blood…

A louder crash of thunder, the front door flying open, You running down the street, knife still in his hand. Loud cries coming from the house. Heavy rain pelted You as he ran, his hair and clothes plastered to his face and body, tears running down his face, mingling with the rain and melting away.

More flashes of lightning as he stood at Gackt’s front door, his hand raised, knuckles rapping on the thick wooden door, the rain still pelting down.

Gackt was awoken by the sound of what seemed to be knocking on his front door. He rubbed his eyes a little to wake himself up some and quietly climbed out of bed, pulling on his black silk robe and tying the sash as he padded barefoot out to the front door. He paused, unlocked it, then swung the door open, wondering who it could be this late.

Lighting illuminated You’s bloodied and wet form as he stood on Gackt’s doorstep, the bloody knife still gripped tightly in his hands.

“Oh… God… You…” Gackt stammered, his eyes wide in shock. “What the hell happened?”

You dropped the knife and threw himself against the vocalist, sobbing silently. Gackt gathered the taller man into his arms, and pushed the door closed. “Ne, come and sit… please… tell me what happened?”

You nodded quietly and took a seat on the couch, blood splattered on his face, hands, his shirt, and his pants. Gackt’s eyes were still wide as he sat, his body trembling a little. “Please…. Tell me…”

You’s eyes were glazed, his body trembling as he fiddled with his hands. “I…” He couldn’t say it… he wasn’t sure what happened.

“Do you love me Gaku?” He asked suddenly, changing the topic quickly as he could.

Gackt’s head cocked to the side in curiosity. “Of course I do You-kun. Why are you asking?”

You turned his head, glazed gaze staring at Gackt’s perfect face. His mind was everywhere. Leaning in quickly he took hold of Gackt’s face and kissed him roughly, the taller singer pulling away quickly.

“What are you doing?” His eyes stared at You again, his mouth open in shock.

“I… You… You don’t love me like that do you?” His head hung low, staring at his lap.

“Of course…” Gackt reached out, gently touching You’s face. “It’s just…”

“He’s taken.” Hyde’s voice cut in from the bedroom door.

“Hyde…” Gackt got up and moved to the short vocalist, You’s eyes staring at them both.

“What are you two doing?” He asked, his voice thick with sleep.

“You came over he… needed to talk.” Gackt still didn’t know why his friend was covered in blood… or why he had a knife in his hand when the door opened.

Hyde turned and put an arm around Gackt’s waist possessively. “Ahh…” He lent up and kissed Gackt’s cheek softly, his hands playing with Gackt’s body lightly.

You’s eyes watched them; his heart sank in his chest. He didn’t even know. His best friend had never told him he had someone… His emotions were already running amok without needing to see the only other man he’d ever loved get all cuddly in front of him. A tear ran down his face and his body trembled as the two kissed quickly, but passionately. Still worked up from earlier, the sound of the two’s quiet moans sent him over the edge again.

“Stop it…” He said softly, getting to his feet.

The two didn’t hear him; they were too caught up in each other. His eyes were narrow, his face contorted as he grabbed Hyde and shoved him away roughly, the small man slamming into the wall and falling. Gackt opened his mouth to speak, but You’s mind was gone, he once again had no idea what he was doing.

“You… no!” Gackt cried out, moving to defend himself.

You grabbed the vocalist and threw him to the side, Gackt landing against a large desk and falling to the ground. You moved to his side and grabbed his head, slamming it into the edge of the desk repeatedly, Gackt trying his best to fight the crazed man off. Once Gackt had stopped resisting, You stopped. More blood…

Hyde was unconscious by the wall still as You stood straight and walked stiffly out the front door, pulling it closed behind him, leaving blood on the handle. He walked silently down the street; the rain had stopped, leaving the air cold and bitter. It was a good hour before his mind calmed enough for him to fully comprehend what had gone on tonight.

“Oh…. God…. I… No….” He stopped where he was in the street, hands going over his mouth, his face paling.

He’d killed the two people he loved in the world.

He’d killed…

You’s body trembled as it all hit home, his knees buckling beneath him as he fell to the pavement. “Oh God. Oh God. Oh God!” He stammered, flashes of memory resurfacing.

Tatsuha and the other man on the bed, both moaning in ecstasy. The screams from Tatsuha, the blood on the knife, his dead body on the bed… He got to his feet shakily and walked down the road, heading towards Tokyo Tower.

Hyde and Gackt touching each other, kissing each other passionately. Gackt’s terrified face, the sounds of bone meeting wood, Gackt’s blood on the floor, the table, You’s hands… He rode the elevator to the top and walked to the railings, numbly staring down at the busy city below.

“I’m sorry…” He whispered to the wind, hoping that somehow the souls of the two men he loved would hear it.

He shakily climbed onto the top railing, balancing, and stared out over Tokyo.

“I’m so... so sorry…” Tears ran down his face, illuminated by the moonlight.

You let himself tip forward, his feet leaving the safety railing as he fell.

I won’t even get to see Gackt in Heaven… I’ll never get there…

~owari~