Have a Day

Have a Day!
INT.

Act: 1

Scene 1: A stage

Cleveland walks onto a stage upon that is empty.
He is holding a sheet of paper with the poem,"I
Do Wonder", on it.

CLEVELAND
I will now recite a poem by the
now passe poetic, Edward Reep,
called "I Do Wonder".
(reading from the poem)
Winter's snow a upon. The sweet
things around I like, and make me
think it does. I wonder. I wonder
about where it came from. Where
it ends. Where I end. Where came
from I did. For all the snow
knows the Glenson. Ruf. Ruf. Ruf.
Why? Wonder. Wonder I do. Ruf.
Ruf. Ruf. Ruf. Arr, matey.
Wonder. Wonder. Wonder. Wonder.
Wonder. Wonder. Wonder. Wonder.
Wonder I do. Bark.

Cleveland then takes a bow. Larry walks
onstage.

LARRY
That was quite a poem you
performed. I enjoyed it.

CLEVELAND
You did?

LARRY
Certainly. It is a great piece.
Interesting indeed.

CLEVELAND
Does it make one think?

LARRY
I think it does.

CLEVELAND
That's good.

LARRY
It did pose a question to me,
though.

CLEVELAND
What?

LARRY
What happens, when we die? Cause
I don't like having that question
unanswered, and I don't want the
wrong answer.

CLEVELAND
Well, Larry, it's about personal
belief. What ever you believe is
true for you.

LARRY
So, are you saying that I need to
find what to belief, and it will
be true for me.

CLEVELAND
Exactly. Go out. Find what you
like best, and you shall have
that.

LARRY
Thank you very much.

CLEVELAND
You're quite welcome.

Larry walks off stage. End of scene 1.

Scene II: The Apartment of Gleaso

Gleaso and Larry are sitting at a table in the
apartment.

LARRY
You have been my friend for 10
years.

GLEASO
And counting.

LARRY
I have come to ask of you an
important question.

GLEASO
What question?

LARRY
What happens to you, when you
die?

GLEASO
Well, I believe that what happens
to you is that you pop out of
existence from your own view. You
are nothing. Remember what it was
like before you were born?

LARRY
No.

GLEASO
That is what it's like, when you
die. You cease to exist from your
perspective.

LARRY
I don't like that. How can you
believe such an item?

GLEASO
It's what's most logical.

LARRY
I disagree. That's not what I am
going to believe.

GLEASO
Very well. Do you want to talk
about something else?

LARRY
Okay.

GLEASO
There's a problem with the
vegetable retailing industry. The
vegetables don't taste as good
they should or used to. I think
that's a problem that needs to be
rectified. I am going to write a
letter to the vegetable retailing
industry telling them about this
lack in taste. Vegetables should
taste good because they are what
make Chinese food worth all that
money.

LARRY
I see what you are saying, though
I must disagree. Vegetables taste
absolutely fine and are much
better than what was yesteryear.
Chinese is garbage to begin
with.

GLEASO
Very well. Would you like a glass
of bottled water?

LARRY
I'd like a bottle of it.

GLEASO
Very well. I shall go and bring
back a bottle of Hydreogen 2
Oxygen.

LARRY
Thank you very much.

GLEASO
You are quite welcome.

Gleaso walks off stage and comes back with a
bottle of water.

GLEASO
Here you are. A bottle of water.

LARRY
Thank you very much.

GLEASO
You are quite welcome. You sure
did say it.

Scene 3: A church

Preachera is at a church podium. The podium is
facing the audience. Larry walks up to him.
Preachera will always look at the audience for
Scene 3.

PREACHERA
(to the audience)
I ain't that old, and neither are
you. We better sing the midnight
song maybe.

LARRY
(to Preachera)
Preachera, I have a question.

PREACHERA
Ah, Larry. The one, who never
went to this church at all.

LARRY
Sorry very much so.

PREACHERA
How may I help you?

LARRY
I have a question.

PREACHERA
I'm a preacher. You questions are
the desire of the profession that
is mine.

LARRY
What happens, when you die?

PREACHERA
That depends on your life. At the
end of it all: If you were a
unbad person, you would go upor
an eternity of bliss and the
like. If you were a bad person,
you'd go down for an eternity of
unbliss.

LARRY
I don't like the idea of
eternity.

PREACHERA
Well, that's what I, and those
that follow me believe.

LARRY
That's something I won't
believe.

PREACHERA
So, does every human cease?

LARRY
I don't believe that.

PREACHERA
Then what do you believe?

LARRY
I dunno, and what if I don't want
a final end but don't want an
eternity?

PREACHERA
I dunno. I'm a preacher. I do
what the unbad book tells me.

LARRY
Okay. Thank you very much.

PREACHERA
You are quite welcome. I also
want to inform you of something
else.

LARRY
What would that something else
be?

PREACHERA
Inanimate objects are being
married by people with little
time on there hands, being ones
of irresponsibility. It is
ungood. We need to stop these
people from wasting precious time
with frivolous marriage between
inanimate objects. This effects
me because I am a preacher and
therefore, must carry out these
marriages as my duty to the
state.

LARRY
I see. What can I do to stop
these people from exercising an
action that hurts no non-
consenting other.

PREACHERA
It hurts people. These people
have important jobs like
firefighters or police officers.
People die because of unnecessary
matrimony.

LARRY
That doesn't sound good.

PREACHERA
It is ungood. We must stop them,
and you can do that by signing
this petition to allow me to
choose not to marry someone, even
if they are legitimate and ask
nicely.

Preacher takes out from under the podium a
petition on a piece of paper that has maybe
three other signatures. The preacher puts it on
the podium. Larry takes out a pen and signs.

PREACHERA
Thanks a bunch.

LARRY
Welcome. Have a day.

PREACHERA
Have a day indeed.

Larry walks out of the room.

Scene 4: Larry's Room of Reading

Larry is sitting in his reading room and is
reading a book. He then puts it down.

LARRY
That is quite a dilemma. I don't
want an end. I don't want
forever.

Vol comes onstage.

VOL
I am a being known as Val.

LARRY
Hi, Val.

VOL
I have come to tell you that I
will present you with a belief of
the afterlife that will work out
perfectly for you.

LARRY
What?

VOL
First, you must fall in love.
Then I will tell.

LARRY
Okay.

Vol walks off stage.

Re walks onstage.

RE
I am a being that can only be
seen by you known as Re that, and
I am here to tell you of someone,
who may be that special someone,
who you as a person may end up
loving.

LARRY
Wow. I better go find someone,
who I may love. And that's
Chicago.

LARRY
Okay.

RE
Glenna is the one you Go to her.
I will come to help you out
periodically. Away to her.

LARRY
Sure. Tomorrow. It is late.

RE
I know. I think a problem can be
found in engaging in important
things too late.

LARRY
I know. Late is for
entertainment.

RE
Exactly. I shall vacate.

Re walks out.

Act 2

Scene 1: The Area of Dining

Glenna is sitting at a dining table with her
father Fiono and

.0 her brother Zel.

FIONO
Ordering the pizza at 8:12 was a
really stupid idea, especially,
since we normally sit down at
8:02.

ZEL
It'll take such a longest time
for the pizza to get here.

GLENNA
I'm sorry, if someone was
clogging the phone.

ZEL
Let's look on the bright side.
I'm moving out.

FIONO
You should have gotten out of
here a good while ago.

ZEL
I know that very much.

FIONO
Glenna, soon you will move out of
my house and find your fortune
among the world.

ZEL
Yes indeed. I have already found
my fortune.

FIONO
He has. He shall make good money
selling his urine.

ZEL
I must drink.

FIONO
How shall you find your fortune?

GLENNA
I will take a walk into the park
and then see what I can see from
there.

FIONO
That sounds like an interesting
idea. I like it. Like that
scheme, Zel?

ZEL
Yes.

FIONO
So then be it. You shall take a
walk into the park.

ZEL
When?

GLENNA
Why not the day after tomorrow?

ZEL
Why not?

FIONO
Why not?

GLENNA
Yes.

ZEL
Go to your room, Glenna.

GLENNA
Yes.

FIONO
We'll call you, when the pizza
arrives.

Glenna walks offstage.

Scene II: Glenna's Room

Glenna enters her room and lies on the floor.

GLENNA
(singing)
Oh but the songbirds sing. Oh but
the songbirds know. I shall know
what the scurry, if you lied. I
shall know what the scurry, if
you lied. How about that, my man?
How about that, baseball. Oh but
the singbords known. Oooo but the
boards of sing sung now. I want
to feel that falling down right
up there. Cause I want to know
the toe that shall reign over the
computer. Krusty. Krusty.

GLENNA
Ah yeah. I don't know, if my
fortune is what my father wants
it to be. Money. My fortune can
be something else. It can be
something wonderful. I hope it
is.

Scene 3: Dining Area

ZEL
That Glenna of ours.

FIONO
Oh, you know.

ZEL
It's sad that mother died.

FIONO
Yes, your mum was a great woman.

ZEL
I loved her with all my heart.

FIONO
So, did I. I loved her equally as
my children I think.

ZEL
Which is even better than loving
us more.

FIONO
Yes.

ZEL
I want the pizza come.

FIONO
You should be drinking water
right now. Why aren't you?

ZEL
I want food with my drink.

FIONO
That makes sense.

ZEL
Do you want to play a game about
geography?

FIONO
I would like that a lot.

ZEL
I say the name of some sort of
location as small as a town, and
you have to say one that begins
with the letter that ends the
location stated previously.

FIONO
That sounds fun. Who thought of
that?

ZEL
It was me and only me, who ever
thought of that idea. Alaska.

FIONO
Argentina.

ZEL
Algeria.

FIONO
Australia.

ZEL
Africa.

FIONO
Asia.

ZEL
Alabama.

FIONO
Austria.

FIONO
Albania.

ZEL
Antarctica.

FIONO
Andalusia.

ZEL
Armenia.

ZEL
Allentown.

Act 3

Scene 1: The Park

Larry is at a park bench. Re is behind him.

RE
She shall come through this park,
according to my information.

LARRY
Thank you.

RE
I will go.

Re leaves the stage. Glenna walks onstage.

GLENNA
Now, where is my fortune?

LARRY
Are you Glenna?

GLENNA
Why hello, sir. I am Glenna.

LARRY
I am Larry. Come, sit with me.

GLENNA
(to herself)
Perhaps he will be my fortune.

Glenna sits down next to Larry.

LARRY
Nice day?

GLENNA
Yes it is.

LARRY
Nice days are kinds of things I
admire because their niceness has
a certain charm that really works
well into providing an atmosphere
that maintains my interests along
with making the background great-
like.

GLENNA
I see what you are saying.
Though, I hate days like this. I
prefer the rain. I think the rain
has a kind of beauty to it that
just is dark but perfect. It just
fits a mood wonderfully. I adore
it. It makes me feel not so up
but in a good way.

LARRY
I can see what you are saying. Do
you wish to go out for ice cream
tomorrow?

GLENNA
No.

LARRY
Okay. What school did you go to?

GLENNA
School? What's that?

LARRY
That's a place, where you learn.

GLENNA
I was kidding with you. I know
school. I went there. Now I don't
go there because I graduated.

LARRY
That sounds very nice. I had a
interesting school experience.
Crunching academics and drinking
fruit drinks were my days. I also
had friends.

GLENNA
Really?

LARRY
Yes. There was Bertoucci,
Kliestr, and Dorel.

GLENNA
Did you hang out?

LARRY
No. Currently, my only friend is
a man named Gleaso.

GLENNA
That's an nice name. What do you
do for living?

LARRY
I peel potatoes for a living.

GLENNA
Oh, that sounds nice. Where?

LARRY
A potatoes factory. I only work
on mondays.

GLENNA
Bargain job. How do you get by?

LARRY
I am paid well because something
happened, and I chose not to
sue.

GLENNA
What?

LARRY
I cut my hand on the topato-
peeler.

GLENNA
I see. Could you get me a job at
the topato factory?

LARRY
Sure. I'll have to check Borisio,
our manager.

GLENNA
(to herself)
This could be my fortune
possibly.

LARRY
What'd you say?

GLENNA
This could be my fortune
possibly.

LARRY
I see. You know, there is
something: deli-style mozzarella
cheese that just hits the spot.

GLENNA
I agree, especially on pizza-like
items.

GLENNA
Thanks. I find your hair pretty
hair. Lot's of people have hair
that happens to be pretty,
though. It's an uneasy thing to
not find.

LARRY
Really?

GLENNA
Today is your "really" day. Is it
not?

LARRY
I wanna know the truth.

GLENNA
Okay, but I mean just look
around. People have pretty hair.
Why don't you think of three of
some your human friends or
aquatints, who you encountered
recently, and see, if their hair
is pretty?

LARRY
Okay. I believe there's
Cleveland.

Cleveland walks onstage.

LARRY
His hair is so-so to okay.

GLENNA
That's only one yet.

LARRY
It's the first one.

GLENNA
Go on.

Gleaso then walks onstage near Cleveland.

LARRY
Gleaso has wonderful hair.

GLENNA
See, and averaging wonderful and
so-so to okay together you get
pretty.

LARRY
A lower pretty.

GLENNA
But a pretty nonetheless.

LARRY
Okay.

Preachera then walks onstage near Gleaso.

LARRY
Preachera's hair is a moderate
pretty.

GLENNA
Put that together with lower
pretty, and you get a sub-
moderate pretty.

LARRY
You're right then. Thinking about
it, most people have at least
pretty hair.

GLENNA
That's a good thing to know. It's
a scope of the human physique.

LARRY
Yeah.

GLENNA
Do you wanna come over to my
house for dinner sometime like
today?

LARRY
Sure, and I can take you to the
topato factory.

GLENNA
That would be wonderful. We
should tell my dad about that.

and, and Preachera exit the stage.

LARRY
What's your Dad's name?

GLENNA
Fiono, and I have a brother named
Zel.

LARRY
What do they do for a living?

GLENNA
My dad right now businessman of
sorts. He sometimes enters in
busine

Gleaso, Clevel

GLENNA
ss ventures.

LARRY
Ventures, you say? What kinds of
ventures?

GLENNA
A whole bunch. Too many off the
top of my head.

LARRY
What does Zel do?

GLENNA
He sells his urine?

LARRY
I never heard of that.

GLENNA
Fantastic business.

LARRY
Wow. So, should I get your phone
number?

GLENNA
Can you come over to my place of
residence now?

LARRY
Sure.

GLENNA
Let's go.

Glenna and Larry walk offstage.

Scene II: The Dining Area

Glenna, Zel, Larry, and Fiono are all sitting at
the dining table.

FIONO
I'm really sorry that the
rotisserie chicken hasn't arrived
yet. Zel, you were supposed to
that.

ZEL
I was drinking water at the
time.

LARRY
You can dilute your sodium
content, Zel, if you drink too
much.

ZEL
What?

LARRY
If you drink too, the effect of
your body's salt will lesson
because of all the water. You can
die.

ZEL
Really?

LARRY
Yes. How many cups a day of
liquid?

ZEL
Fifteen.

LARRY
That's too much. Do you engage in
activity that is strenuously
physical in nature?

ZEL
No.

LARRY
That's not good.

ZEL
Whatever. I can afford to die.
I'll have the money.

LARRY
How much does it pay?

ZEL
Think one hundred bucks a pint.

LARRY
That's good.

FIONO
I'm proud of my son. I don't care
about that sodium content
nonsense. Water can't dilute
salt.

LARRY
Okay guys.

FIONO
Okay. It don't matter.

GLENNA
Yeah. I have a surprise for you.

FIONO
What?

GLENNA
Tell him.

LARRY
I'm going try to get her a job at
the topato factory.

FIONO
Wow. That's wonderful.

GLENNA
I know. He gets paid well at the
topato factory.

FIONO
You better make sure my daughter
gets paid well.

LARRY
Oh, I will definitely.

FIONO
You know, I remember my first job
before I became the part-time
business venturerer I am now. I
was a farm-hand. I would work at
the farm and tend to the animals
and crops, cutting them with my
bare hands and harvesting their
delicious sustenance. I would
then load the food into a van and
it would be driven off to the
processing plant, where it would
boiled for about ten minutes and
then cut into pieces and put in a
freeze-dried pack and then sold
at dollar stores.

LARRY
That's sounds like a life.

FIONO
Oh, it was, but I couldn't go on
because I met your mother, Glenna
and Zel. Boy, was she beautiful,
a wonder, a pretty, oh she had it
all. Then I moved here, got into
my business ventures like radios,
pens, garlic sauce, and
construction. I then had you two.
Then your mother died from a
heart attack for she ate too much
lard. Lard is a killer. Now I
know have two wonderful children
and the memory of my wife, which
is good enough for Lee.

LARRY
Indeed.

ZEL
You never told us this before,
Dad.

FIONO
Now, I have. I was a farm-hand,
and your mother ate too much
lard.

LARRY
So, will it rain today?

FIONO
Why it rains everyday. All around
the world, there is rain. Oh, so
much rain. Reigning upon us.

GLENNA
I disconcur. I think that there
is no such thing as rain. That
rain is a figment of our
imagination. That it's about
water falling from the sky but a
little piece of beauty that
wonders up the highway at
night.

ZEL
If there is no rain, how we would
get water?

GLENNA
It is replenished ever second by
a force.

LARRY
I can see, where you are going
with that. Who can disprove you?

FIONO
I can. I once spent a night lost
in the rain, and I knew in my
liver that this was real. Oh, it
is was real.

GLENNA
Then, it must be real. I am sorry
for my saying.

FIONO
Worry not.

LARRY
I'm also sorry.

FIONO
Worry not.

ZEL
So, where did we all as human-
beings come from?

FIONO
That's a good question. Why don't
you say first, Larry, since you
are our guest?

LARRY
I dunno for sure.

FIONO
I shall go then, and then shall
go Glenna, and then Zel could go
last for he asked the question. I
believe that we were created by a
loving force that built us all in
Her image.

LARRY
Interesting. I don't see any
evidence to disprove that.

GLENNA
I see evidence. Why would a being
like that be a Her? Would not it
be without gender.

FIONO
I must say gender of course. For
She is not an it, and this
language not allows us for a
gender-less non-it.

GLENNA
Create a word then.

FIONO
Very well. Qore will take the
place of Her and Qora will take
the place of She.

LARRY
I don't like the sound of that.
It doesn't sound right.

FIONO
How about V will be Her and W
will be She.

LARRY
I'm fine with that.

FIONO
Very well. W created us all V
image.

LARRY
I see.

GLENNA
I agree. W create us all in V
image. What about you Larry?

LARRY
Mmmm.

GLENNA
Okay, then. Zel, what do you
think?

ZEL
I think there was the big bang.

FIONO
I dunno, if that's so good.

ZEL
What do you mean?

FIONO
The big bang doesn't work for
me.

ZEL
Why is that?

Scene 3: The Room of Glenna

Larry and Glenna walk into Glenna's room.

GLENNA
Did you enjoy our dinner?

LARRY
It was nice.

GLENNA
That's good to hear. Know what?

LARRY
What?

GLENNA
Love you I do.

LARRY
Really?

GLENNA
Yeah. I love as you friend.

LARRY
I love you too as a friend.

GLENNA
That conversation bought us
closer.

LARRY
Am I in love with you as a
friend?

GLENNA
Why not? We're both in love with
each other as friends.

Re and Vol walk in.

RE
You've done it, Larry.

LARRY
Re, you didn't really visit me
periodically beyond once.

RE
I didn't expect it would take
this short.

GLENNA
Who's Re?

LARRY
Oh, Re's a being only I can see.
(pointing to Vol)
And that's Val.

GLENNA
Hi Val.

VOL
Hi, Glenna.
(to Larry)
Well, Larry. You have fallen in
love. Now, I will tell you a
belief of the afterlife that will
work out perfectly for you.

LARRY
What is it?

VOL
Just believe that whatever it
will be is whatever will work out
perfectly for you. It exists.

LARRY
Okay. Thank you so much.

VOL
You are quite welcome. Have a
day!

Vol walks offstage. Re also walks off.

LARRY
Goodbye Re and Vol.

RE (OFFSTAGE)
Goodbye Larry.

LARRY
So, Glenna, why don't we
platonically sleep in the same
bed tonight and then tomorrow we
shall head to the topato
factory.

GLENNA
Okay.

Act 4

Scene 1: The Topato Factory Manager's Office

The Topato factory manager is in his office and
singing a tune. Larry walk in. The topato
factory manager looks over at Larry. Larry joins
in.

MANAGER
(when they are done singing)
Hey, Larry. How are you doing,
buddy?

LARRY
Absolutely wonderful.

MANAGER
That's delicious. Did we get any
potatoes shipments in yet?

LARRY
No.

MANAGER
In the mean time I have a desire
to converse with you.

LARRY
Okay.

MANAGER
I think that America, when
something bad happens to it gets
a little kind of like "I'm so
special", when around this world
there is so much horror, yet,
when only let's so five-hundred
die it's the greatest terrible
thing America has known, even
though Africa has like a third of
the population with AIDs.
Americans have to spot being like
they are. That media.

LARRY
I agree partially. The media is
bad but most Americans are not
like that.

MANAGER
Very well. Slavery should also be
legal I say.

LARRY
Why is?

MANAGER
Because I believe you should have
the right to own your own life,
and therefore, you should be
allowed to sell it.

LARRY
I agree. Slavery should be
legal.

MANAGER
Movies are ungood.

LARRY
I disagree. Movies rock.

MANAGER
Do you really believe that?

LARRY
They're better than food.

MANAGER
Do you know of the propaganda
machine?

LARRY
Yes.

MANAGER
It's very existence is mere
propaganda.