The Truth Is Revealed

The Truth Revealed


Inside the small claustrophobic room Samantha Jenkins sighed heavily at the realization that everything she owned was inside those four dirty cream walls. A small lockable cabinet which housed the women’s toiletries and personal items separated the two beds. A worn old hairbrush with old and dirty hair wrapped around the bristles and a few elastic bands were scattered on top. A small wardrobe on the far side of the room housed the few items of clothing the two women owned.
Along with Sammy there was a tall black women named Clara Grooves. Clara stood head and shoulders above Sammy and she had felt sorry for the women who had seemed in a complete state of fear when she had arrived at her new apartment. Clara and Sammy had been room mates since Sammy arrived and they had hot it off from the very first day they met.

“Which is my bed” Sammy had asked shyly
“Which do you want”?
Sammy had surveyed the two beds to see which one looked as if it was being used.
“This one”?
“That one is mine” Clara had stated looking down upon Sammy.
“This one then” Sammy had said quickly pointing to the other bed.
“Nope that’s mine too”
“Oh” Sammy had sadly replied

Clara had started to laugh and couldn’t stop. Sammy had looked at her laughing and felt like crying but started to laugh too, Clara’s laugh was contagious. Perhaps sharing with this new women would turn out to be quite fun, Clara could not remember the last time she had laughed. The bed Sammy had first chosen had not been Clara’s. She had slept in that bed first but the mattress had been so lumpy that she could never get to sleep laid upon that thing. So she had opted for the other bed and found it much comfier. Knowing this she willingly gave up the comfy bed and told Sammy that was hers. A lifelong friendship had begun.

This room held all their worldly possessions. It was not much they knew but it was home for the farseeing future. The outside world no longer held any meaning to either woman. They wanted to be here and against all odds they knew for their own safety and well being they had to stay. Samantha’s release date was slowly creeping up. This made her heart beat wildly out of control until the panic set in and she found it a struggle to breathe when she thought about it.

“Why on earth do you want to stay here a minute longer than you have too”?
Sammy looked up to see Clara looking sadly at her.
Clara had become a very good friend; she had taken her under her wing and made her stay as safe and as pleasurable as it could ever possibly be.
Clara was highly looked up too, the other girls knew not to mess with her, and she had proven herself many times over. She deserved the respect she gained from the other girls, Sammy included.

“Sammy” she almost screamed.
Sammy felt the guilt and the fear rise deep up from the pit of her empty stomach until it burned in her throat making her feel quite nauseated.
“You only got Three years; you should have been out after eighteen months. Why after five years are you still here”?

Sammy smiled at her friend. She had grown to love this woman. Sammy knew more about her than Clara knew about herself. Clara had been here more than two years before Sammy arrived, she knew the insides and outsides of everything. The way things worked inside this place, nothing escaped Clara. She had been sentenced to eight years for murder. She could have been out herself by now but always seemed to get involved inside her friends mixed up world. Whenever Sammy started fights or threw more insults at the Prison Officers she always stood by her side. Along with the extra time Sammy was given, Clara received the same. Both women seemed happy to be given more time together. For this Sammy could never thank her, it was if she knew she needed her. The only true friend she had ever known. Sammy would be forever in debt to her for the friendship she gave. Unknowingly Clara felt exactly the same about Sammy. These two women would go as far to kill for each other; it was joked about around the prison that these two women were one of the same people. Where ever one was the other was only a step behind. If you upset one you upset the other. If you fought with one you had to fight both. Together they made a great team.

Clara had had a very different start in life to Sammy; while Clara’s parents both drank heavily and her mother and herself had been abused by her father .Sammy’s parents were well respected members of the church, a loving family that was shattered upon the news of their daughter’s criminal actions. Her parents had disowned her. Clara witnessed the attacks upon her mother from a very early age. So it wasn’t at all surprising to hear that she went on to lead a life which revolved around violence and crime. Sadly it all came to a head one late evening when she was inside a club and a girl totally unknown to her was assaulted by her boyfriend. It was only a drunken brawl the Police reports had read. It had been a drunken argument that got out of hand. But to Clara the years of built up anger caused by having to witness the abuse her mother and herself had received, at the hands of her Father and knowing this was the reason her mother had killed herself cascaded over and the volcano bubbled and the larvae spilled out. She had taken all she could of seeing women abused by men.

As the pint glass she held tightly in her right hand was slammed down upon the unsuspecting strangers head, a slight relief was breathed. She only hoped he would be taught a lesson and think twice about abusing his girlfriend again. Sadly he died on the way to hospital. Clara had become a murderer with a few short minutes. I envied her more than she would ever realise.

What does it feel like to kill? I could only imagine. I only knew what it felt like to try and fail. I couldn’t even do that right.

Clara showed no remorse for her actions. As far as she was concerned he was an abuser to women so deserved to die. Of course she had never intended to actually kill this man but now that he was dead she felt she had made a difference to the world. One more abuser was removed. If only she was able to confide in her friend perhaps she could be more of a help to her, if she wanted to kill another abuser Sammy knew the perfect one. But she loved this women and the thought only crossed her mind for a split second before it was gone again.

“Why would a man want to beat up his own wife and daughter” Clara asked so many times “What the hell makes them think they can do it and get away with it?”

“Because they can” Sammy wanted to scream back “Because the women stay with so he thinks he can do whatever he wants and she will still stay with him”
Instead she shook her head in deep sympathy and kept her eyes diverted.

How could she possibly tell her friend the deep dark secret she kept hidden away? This woman had befriended her, taken care of her and become her only friend. Knowing the pain she felt towards abused women, thinking Sammy felt the same way, how could she ever tell her the truth? She was abused also. Sammy was one of these abused women Clara despised with vengeance.
What saddened Clara more was not the initial thought of a man beating up a women but the sheer fact that these women stayed with their abuser. Sammy stayed with hers for over fifteen years. How would she ever be able to explain this?

“If my mother had left that bastard then my life might have been worth living” she had cried “Why did she stay with him? Why did she choose to live that life rather than thinking of what it was doing to me”?” Why did she not leave him”?

“Tell me Sam please help me I need to know” she had sobbed that morning.
“It is driving me insane, why did my mother put me through all that”?
Sammy was sat at the bottom of her bed. The mattress was hard and it made for a very disturbed nights sleep Sammy was quite pleased that her own bed was soft at least. Not that she slept much so it didn’t really matter all that much.
“Did my mother hate me”? She cried
“Oh Clara of course she never hated you, how could you think such a thing”?
“She left me; she killed herself knowing that that bastard would be able to carry on doing what he was doing to me. I wish she had killed me first and then killed herself”
Clara was uncontrollably sobbing. Sammy held her tight and brushed the hair that had become stuck tight to her wet cheek from the tears that ran down them.
“I just need to know that my mother loved me”

Her friend’s heart was breaking for her. She felt her pain and it hurt deep down inside of her.
“Your mum loved you more than life itself I am sure”
“No she didn’t “Clara spat back “If she loved me she would never had stayed with that bastard”
“Sometimes I guess, where there’s kids involved it sometimes seems the right thing to do” Sammy said gently “The guilt of taking the child away from her own daddy is stronger than the fear of staying. You think that staying with him will change him. Giving him just one last chance to prove he can be a good daddy and husband makes you stick it out that little bit longer.”
Clara looked up sadly .Trying with all her might to keep her voice in the same tone to hide the fear and hate in her voice.
“So she stayed with him because of me”? She had asked

“I don’t know” Her friend told her “Your thoughts are not your own. Once you have been conditioned to think and act in a certain way, your own thoughts don’t even belong to you. You have no sense of what is wrong and what is right. You live for making him happy, you live to make him change. You live each day walking on egg shells as to not make him angry. But more than anything you want him to love you.”

I had no answer to her questions but was qualified to know the feelings and the guilt.
“This man you once loved with all your heart, the father of your beloved child despite what he does, deep inside is still the man you once loved so much. He probably loved your mum just as much; sometimes loving too much can be very dangerous.”

“Didn’t seem to me he loved her very much” she said wiping her tears away on her sleeve.
“I don’t know why your mums choose to stay with your dad; I don’t know why she left you. All I do know is that at some point she loved your dad very much to put up with all the things he did to her and it must of broke her heart to know he was also abusing you. But, I guess she convinced herself that things could only get better. I do not believe she wanted these things to happen. Perhaps it was easier to stay than leave”? That is usually the case, you are more frightening to leave and the easier option is too stay.

“Clara “I asked gently “Perhaps talking to your dad might help heal a few open wounds”

She looked at me with a face as white as a ghost. She knew she had to deal with her demons once and for all, it was tearing her up inside. All she needed to know was that her mother loved her. Her father was the only one who could bring her some closure.
“I will ask the screws to send him a visiting pass” with that remark she got up and darted out of the room leaving me sat at the bottom of her bed. We never discussed him visiting again.

Six days later Clara sat opposite her Father. It was the same day I had a surprise visitor.

“Who” I had asked the screw
“Never mind that, just get up and follow me, someone’s here to see you” she told me softly smiling. The smile I knew was down to the fact that in the five years I had been here I had not had one single visit.

Clara I spotted to the right of the room, the man opposite I knew had to be her father. I smiled at her as I walked past and could not help but growl at her father, which amused Clara. She looked shocked to see me there, she had no idea I had anyone who would want to visit me. There were many tables in the room with the inmates at one side and their loved ones sat opposite.
I was led to a table where an unknown face smiled up at me.
“Samantha” she asked
I nodded in reply wondering who on earth this girl was and more to the point what she wanted.
“I am Beth” she said softly. Sensing my puzzlement she ended the introductions with “Andrew’s girlfriend”
My body began to shake; the fear began to rise inside at the mention of his name.
I searched her eyes, I saw my own fear. She understood my reaction. I had never heard his name mentioned in over five years now.

“I know the truth” she stated “I know what happened”
I diverted my eyes as quickly as I possibly could “I don’t know what you’re talking about” I told her as strongly as I could.
How could this young girl know anything about what happened? I had held my hands up feely and he had sat back and let me.
“What do you know” I asked her confidently knowing she wouldn’t be able to say much.
“I know everything “she told me sadly, the tears rising in her eyes. “ I had to come and see you”
“I don’t mean to sound rude but what the hell are you talking about” I said with my voice a little too raised.
“I know you should never have been put in here for a start”
“I attacked him with a bloody hammer” I replied “Of course I should be in here; you do not attempt murder then walk away freely”
“In self defense you do” she said coldly. “

Beth was a beautiful looking girl I guessed to be around seventeen years of age, I was a good source of judgment, she was eighteen. She had the same colour eyes the same colour hair, she was certainly a good look a like. He had chosen my replacement well. He had found himself another me.

“I am begging you not to do this” I said pleading with her
“I have too, I am sorry to drag it all back up for you, but I have lived with him for five years now and he is going to kill me if I don’t get out” she sobbed
“Yeah and he will kill me if I get out” I replied I had only meant to think it and not actually speak it.
“I need your help”
“What can I do?” I asked coldly
“I need you to tell the truth” she said it so plainly “ I want him locked away for the things he has done , I need you to be a witness” she was now crying freely “ I will do all I can to get you out of here in return”
“Don’t you get it” I told her “I don’t want to get out”
She looked at me in amazement. “If you help me he will never be able to get to either of us ever again”
“He will always find a way “I told her sadly “I am sorry but I can not help you.
My heart stopped beating as I heard her voice.
“He beat you, raped you, and left you for dead how many times”?
I fixed my eyes on the table and tried to make my feet move but they stuck fast.
“He has done the same to me; he told me he had done these things to you. I risked my own life bringing the subject back up so I could tape record the confessions” she cried “Don’t you see, you are not guilty he is”
I slowly turned to look at this young girl. I could feel the anger inside her. She wanted rid of this man as much as I did, but was she prepared to do what I was.
“I am sorry but I can not help you”
“He killed your baby” she snarled at me “That bastard killed your baby “
I felt the tears of despair well in my eyes at the thought of that moment I had witnessed my dead precious baby laid there on that cold mortuary slab. I lied to protect him, he killed my baby and I said nothing. Did I love him that much?

“I want revenge” she raged
“Not as much as I do” I snarled. In that instance I knew the only way to be free of him for good was that if he was killed just like my baby was. I didn’t want him locked up in prison. There was always a chance for release. No the only way I would be free and Beth would be free and every other women he came into contact with would be free from this man’s clutches was if he was dead. But I had failed the first time, could I do it right the second time around? Would I get the chance to finish what I had started?

Beth looked back wearily at me. For the past twenty minutes she had forgotten where she was and who she was talking too. She was sat in a room full of women who had criminal and violent backgrounds, the majority had tried to kill and a few had actually killed. She looked at me with new eyes.
“Let me get you out of here, please, you are the only one who can help me. I am carrying his baby. What life will we have with him?”
“You’re pregnant”? Sammy asked sadly
“He does not deserve a child, he’s already killed one he isn’t getting a second chance”
Sammy looked at Beth’s eyes. She knew what she was asking. Beth knew the only person who understood and who could help her get rid of this man once and for all was her boyfriend’s wife.
“You say nothing to anyone and I mean anyone about what you know” Sammy warned her “I will quite gladly take a hammer to your head”
Beth nodded in agreement. A contract had been signed and sealed with that nod.
“I am due for release in three weeks if I behave till then I am free”
“I will write to you and give you all the information you need” Beth told her before standing.
The two young women passed a knowing and understanding look. There was no need for other words to be spoken.

Sammy returned to her room and lay staring at the ceiling which was spinning wildly.

“Who was your visitor?”
Sammy jumped “Oh just a friend” Sammy quickly replied a little too quickly.
“Come on who was it and don’t lie to me”
Clara knew something important had just happened she had been watching her friend like a hawk. She knew by that look in her eyes she had witnessed, her friend was either in trouble or was setting herself up for it.
“It was my husband’s girlfriend”
“What she want”? Clara demanded
“She wants me to kill him “Sammy laughed
Clara had no idea how to respond so she laughed too.
When the screw on shift walked past their room all she could hear was the two women laughing away. She even smiled to herself. It was nice to hear someone laughing for a change. Not much of that went on in here.
“You’re not going to are you”? Clara asked suddenly very afraid for her friend
Sammy stopped laughing and gave a look that warned even Clara not to ask or speak about it ever again.
Clara knew in that instance that whatever happened she needed to be with Sammy wherever she was. She had to protect her. Sammy was up for release in three weeks and Clara had six weeks left. She only hoped she could think of a way to get out before her.