As a high school student I couldn't wait to meet the man of my dreams and fall in love. I knew I wasn't going to meet him in high school, because I only wanted to be friends with guys I went to school with or new from growing up in my neighborhood. So, I thought maybe when I went to college and met knew people my "dream man" would be there. Well, I met someone about a week after I started. He was older, but there was something about him that sometimes made him seem younger. He was the nicest man I had ever met. I don't know if it was because I was knew to the whole dating scene or what, but I feel hard for him right away. Needless to say, he was my first everything. My first, date, kiss, lover, and at that time I thought he was my first and only love. To make a long story short we were together for three years before I found out that he was never "in love" with me. He said he loved me and cared about my feelings and well-being, but I was more like his friend or little sister and always had been. I was hurt, because I thought I was in love with him. Then I thought well, if he's not in love with me, I must not be in love with him. So I dated a few guys and I found myself feeling for a new guy the way felt for the first one. He turned out to be a waste of time and a loser. The thing is I figured out I was in love him in two months, so why didit take three years with the first one? I have come to discover that what felt was lust and friendship. So, I'm wondering, is that all love really is? Is it really possible that love is just an illusion created by lust and friendship? I don't know what the answer is and right now I really don't care. I've decided to focus on me and what makes me happy. Besides now that I'm not looking it seems that more people are interested. Some of them are really cute, so it's only fair that I let them take me out once in while. Bye!
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