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Rated: 13+ · Sample · Thriller/Suspense · #1214932
My attempt at a thriller/suspense story.....written 1 1/2 years ago!!!
*Writer's Note* This is left as it was originally, I've only made spelling changes and such. Just an FYI if you review. =)


I sat there in the mustang in the cool of the morning, just as planned. It was one o'clock and I checked my revolver, six bullets; all that was needed. My partner sat beside me chewing furiously on a toothpick. He was in his thirties and when he wasn't smoking he chewed on toothpicks, which he had three boxes of in the glove compartment.

It wasn't until one twenty that a black limosine pulled up in front of us in the parking lot, five minutes late but still as planned. I hid the revolver in my jacket pocket and stepped out of the mustang. Two men stepped out of the back of the limo and walked to the front. They both wore suits but only one had the briefcase, so far so good.

"You have the money?" the briefcase guy said.

"Yeah it's in the trunk." I said. "You got the goods?'

"You can always count on your Pappa to do the job." he said in a mock grin.

"Open the case"

"Show me the money and it's yours."

I sighed and told my partner to pop the trunk. Pappa and his bodyguard followed us to the back of the mustang. No suspicion yet, just what we wanted.

"How come the Prince ain't here? I thought he was closing da deal?" Pappa said.

I replied." He couldn't make it, business."

"Oh...." Pappa said, his voice trailing off. As Pappa examined the money, I took the revolver out of the jacket pocket and hid it up my sleeve.

" Well now that we got the money here's your prize." Pappa said, handing the briefcase to my partner. It was almost time.

"Nice doin business with ya" Pappa said, holding out his hand. I didn't shake it, but only nodded my head. As Pappa and his bodyguard walked back to the limo I slid my revolver into my hand.

"Don't move." I said with as much emphasis as possible. The revolver was aimed at Pappa's head, likewise with my partner to Pappa's bodyguard.

"Drop the case." I said. Pappa set the case on the ground.

"Now slide it this way." With the heel of his foot Pappa slid the case across the cement, stopping inches away from my feet. My partner picked up the case, his aim never leaving the back of the bodyguard's head. I had my partner hold my gun while I checked Pappa's case. I looked inside.

There in the premolded foam that snugged its form was a large plastic explosive, warning labels and all. I grinned, just what Prince wanted. I closed the case and my partner handed me my gun back. I aimed and fired. BAM! BAM! BAM! Two bullets in the chest, one in the head. This was an old gang symbol, just to throw the cops off our tracks. I began to take aim at the bodyguard when he whirled around and began firing an Uzi. Not as planned but not a big problem.

I grabbed my partner by the jacket and pulled him with me as I jumped behind the mustang. I signaled for him to stay as I went around the other side. The bodyguard's footsteps were fast, he was running. I stood up and aimed. BAM! BAM! BAM! Two in the chest, one in the head, all precise. The bodyguard fell to the ground and layed limp. I walked to the driver's side of the limo and opened the door.

"Charlie, come on, we've got the goods." I said to him.

"Alright I'm comin'." Charlie said, stepping out of the limo. "Next time when I'm under cover for two months and we're bustin' 'em, let me shoot 'em!" Charlie declared.

"Yes yes Charlie, next time." I said, hoping he wouldn't go into one of his huge complaints about how hard he worked on the long way back. As we drove off in the mustang, Charlie started up again. I wasn't until my partner threatened to shoot him and dump him with the other bodies that he became quiet.








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