Denouncing Ignoble Cuteness

Here it is: In a final, all -encompassing show of irresponsibility, here is a drunken-ramble sent forth by almightly Evan Himself denouncing those who utilize shitty grammar and stupid-fucking abbreviations like "U" for "you" and "LOL" for "I'm a stupid bastard who couldn't formulate an intelligent sentence to save my own ass from violation". I think that's what that stands for, at least. Shitty acronym, if you ask me. Anyway, any form of modern texting is fucking WROUGHT with these aborrations of the English language. It's like we had the formula for unparalleled brilliance in a textbook in front ourselves, and in-stead opted to jack off on Websters like he begged for it. I don't get the allure of this shit! It's not cute!!! Especially when you're a fucking 20-something-year-old college student... MALE college student nontheless. I hope utilizing these cute little dipshit nothing garners you more ass, because it's sure as shit not bringing you more respect. The same respect I am currently relinquishing because I couldn't keep my goddamn fingers still on the keyboard after Pabst coated me in a temporary cloak of immunity from my own words. BUT, since I have dwelled on this matter for quite some time and managed to refrain from expressing these thoughts in an antagonizing matter for so long, I will not delete this message even after I have stumbled my way back into sobriety. It needed to be said. We are all regressing into a certain state of stupidity from over-exposure to this stupid fucking fad. I hope I offended some people with this note. I have many friends who I respect a great deal aside from this seemingly menial flaw, but I still get caught up on how stupid this shit is. Maybe it's my own fault for placing an unwarrented emphasis on the matter. Either way, believe you me, my thin veil of tolerance on the matter will continue to be tested by this matter until we all realize that we are degrading ourselves by stooping to such a level. Take the goddamn extra billisecond to type the "yo-" on "you", and bitches beware that "LOL" is about as overplayed as it gets. I'm sorry...that I didn't say this sooner. PEACE.