Woe it is to be me

I’m not a morning person. I hate getting up early in the mornings. The only time I’d ever get up early in the mornings would be when I have something important to do; like beating the crowd to the Boxing Day Sales. But other than that, getting up in the mornings (especially when it’s freezing and I know that I have a long and trying day ahead of me) is a chore! That day when my alarm rang at 8am (my alarm goes off to Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake. I love the music. It makes me almost believe in love again. Almost. But I always stop myself in time. I’m a love cynic), I grunted like a pig and buried myself further under my sheets. I could hear my neighbours getting ready for their classes. I am sandwiched between 2 guys for neighbours; one’s as quiet as a mouse but has loud trumpeting elephants for friends while the other has a bad case of BO and dirty room. I am waiting for the day when rats the size of cats crawl out of his room. I would have to ring the Pipe Piper of Hamlin to get rid of those pests then. I procrastinated a few minutes before surrendering to the growls of my hungry tummy. I swung myself out of bed… and crash… the world spun before me for a second…what the… ouch… gingerly I touched my forehead… I had just knocked my head against the cupboard. Muttering words of wishing the cupboard doom, I got myself ready for breakfast and classes.

After a surprisingly delicious breakfast with a nice hot cup of Milo, I stopped by the pigeon hole to check for mail. Bills… bills… more bills… I was already starting to give up all hope on humanity (save me from these bills!) when my eye caught a postmarked personal letter… yippee… from a friend. The letter went something like this:
Dear Ella,
Hope you are fine. Work really sucks. These people here do not have the time to even go on a date…why, they can’t even find a date! Most of them are either taken or married or have way passed their shelf life and is no longer the ‘eligible bachelor’! Last night they had a party, and everyone was to bring along a friend who is SINGLE! Talk about desperation! Date while you are University! It gets so much harder in the work force. I’ve always thought that it’s easier to find guys in the workforce. Was I ever so wrong!
Hmm, not the kind of content I had in mind but oh well. Date while I’m still at Uni huh? Pfft! Whatever. Stuffing the letter and bills into my bag pack, I made my way to my first set of morning lectures.

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Ding! The lift stopped on my floor. I swiped myself into the common room. The common room always looked like as if a war has been fought; magazines strewn on the ground all tattered, empty pizza cardboards and chip packets lie crumpled in a heap along with canned drinks, random books and papers on the floor and a blackened apple core sat rotting happily atop a heater. The sofas are always used and abused with food stains and shoe marks. An interesting looking toy was wedged sickeningly between the sofa seats. A few of my floor mates were crowding around the tiny 17 inch Sony flat screen TV watching the Tyra Banks Show. What a waste of grey matter, watching Barbie giving advices.
“Hi guys!” I greeted them cheerfully as I made my way to my room. I always greet them whenever I can.
“George came by” said this 6 feet walking pile of dog turd with blue eyes and a horrible grin. He’s the only reason I wish I was big and butch at times.
“Yeah he misses you” chimed the other with brown-blonde hair and donning a blue sweatshirt.
”I’m sure he does” I said, humouring them. God only knows why I spend time talking to 18 year old know it alls.
“He also said that he already has a girlfriend” Walking Turd continued knowingly.
“That’s nice. I’m happy for him” I said, indifferently.
“Are you heartbroken?” Walking Turd asked. He never knows when to shut up.
“No. Like I said I am happy for him” I said, wanting to kill the Turd with each passing second.
“You his sex object then?” the Slime continued. I threw him an evil glare and marched off. Guys! They drive me up the wall! Who needs them anyway? We all should be asexual. Where have all the good guys gone? God must have discontinued his “Eligible Guys” production line. Why?! It’s not like they are not in demand!

Lunch was no better.
“Look around! He’s coming” she said gleefully.
”Who?” I asked as I munched on my pasta. They tasted like crayons; waxy. Pushing my bowl of inedible crayon pasta away, I reached for my slice of cheese cake.
“Oh you know!” she said, wriggling her eyebrows excitedly. I turned around and saw… Elliot.
“Oh” I said stupidly as I remembered last night’s incident…the incident of how I worked up my courage to ask him to the ball only to be rejected because he “will be busy on that night”… and how I had started to feel really foolish…as if he’ll go to the ball with you, I scolded myself.
“You find him hot don’t you?” she continued.
“Yes I do. I don’t deny the fact that he’s aesthetically pleasing” I replied, not bothering to tell her about what I did last night. That’s ok, I consoled myself, it is not the end of the world. I mean, I am sure there are a lot of other Engineering students out there who plays the bass, enjoys History and does not spend a multitude of their time playing computer games. Across the table sat Alan( who is quite charming with his mop of curly hair, soft brown eyes and legs a girl would kill to have)making faces and blowing kisses my way. He then bit his apple and pouted a kiss, before proceeding to pretend to do strip tease.
God save me!
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Tiredly I flopped on my bed and pulled my duvet up to my chin, my yellow platypus stuffed under the arm. It’s been a long day. It’s one of those days where bad things happen. Firstly there was that encounter with the 6 feet walking pile of dog turd. Secondly, oh boy, there I was innocently enjoying a hot shower after dinner when…get this…the fire alarm went off. It was just a fire drill, it’s not like the hostel was on fire. I decided not to risk it so hurriedly I wiped myself dry before rushing to my room to throw on my clothes. I couldn’t believe my luck. I’ve always wondered to myself How funny it would be if the fire alarm went off when you are showering. I’m never ever going to wonder that again! I heard the click of my neighbour locking his door. Tsk, why the hell would he want to lock his door for? Surely the smell of rotting garbage emitting from his room would be enough to deter anyone from entering. It’s not like anyone would want to kidnap him or see his naked sleeping body, I thought evilly as I plumped my pillow.

Soon my head was getting all heavy and fuzzy. A train of thoughts rumbled gently through my head………
At least Elliot is still talking to me…he teased me just now in the common room...that’s a good sign isn’t it…he’s so cute… I love the way he smiles…I wonder what George is up to with his girlfriend now…how cute they both look together…I also want what they have… sigh some people have it all…
That’s ok; it’s not that bad being single… I mean how bad can it be? It’s happier this way…studies first…Elliot…mmmm…. If he ever asks me out….
……….before falling asleep to the thump thump of my own heartbeat.