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Rated: E · Other · Friendship · #1275324
first day back to school after being homebound for a month.
I sat down, and my legs shook uncontrolably. She noticed my fear, even though I thought I hid it well. My eyes searched the room for a clear object to glare at. All I found was a wall covered in multi colored paper and a window too small for escape. so I sat still and avoided as much eye contact with her as possible. The glass tears in my eyes were cutting at my flesh as I forced them to stay away. If I had dared to show my weakness outloud, it would have shattered all over the floor spelling out failure.
"set some goals for yourself, hang them up on your fridge" she gently smiled at me knowing I wasnt going to. All I could relay back to her was "there isnt enough room". did I mean on my fridge? or in my life? She let out a small laugh. "4 days a week, focus on 4 days a week". It seemed impossible to focus on 4 days when I couldnt even comprehend the next 4 hours. But I pushed my body through the halls weaving between designer clothes, the newest hair fads, and the sound of lockers slamming shut. I took a seat in the empty, quiet room. My ears rang in response to how loud the silence was. Will anyone notice? Will they ask? those thoughts raced through my heavy head as they started to one by one walk into the room. A few glances, a couple smiles. But no talking. Not one word said. I could feel my cheeks burning with anticipation and fear. I knew it showed, I knew they could all see it. My face lit on fire for the whole room... I was back. But my shaky legs, red face, and lowered voice gave me away. They knew I wouldnt make it. They knew I wasnt going to last. "describe in detail four important people" that was my assignment. Amber, Steve, Amanda, Thea. My four important people. As I detalied and analyzed in such description everything about those four, everyone in the room disapeared. There was no silence, there was no smacking of the keys. There was music, and happiness. There was even a little smile surfacing from the corner of my mouth. My body took over the feeling of love, and threw away my fear and lonliness.

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