Billy

She sang softly to a star,
And wondered if to believe in anything at all.
Lost and lonely, she sped through life with a painted on smile.
And she
Looked away from her reflection.
The razor decorated her skin,
All of her pain shrieked up from within.
As she screamed his name into her pillow,
She allowed the tears to burn behind her eyes.
And he
Manipulated her weakness
By gifting her with a,
"You never meant anything to me."
Pity lay.
His lips and tongue have tattooed his essence into her mouth
As he handcuffed her with dead dreams,
Force-feeding her tainted memories.

"Do you feel as if I am your winter day whore?"

Sin followed their twisted fate like destiny,
And played hide and seek so mercilessly.
He threw her to the floor,
Filled with violent lust and guilt drenched adrenaline,
She gets left only wanting more.
And she wished that he'd ask her -
"Just stay;
I need you."
But he never does,

She.
Is.
Not.
Important.

"Why is it that I love someone so broken?"

He is beautifully ruptured into something horrific,
A shattered image of an once-was.
They wont ever amount to anything but a nightmare,
A disaster that refuses to give up.
They thrived on the danger of getting caught.
There is no question about it,
He was her favorite self-destruction technique.

Buried in emotion as eyeliner bled down her cheeks,
The sixteen-year-old tragedy filled her wounds with salt.
The reason is that she still loved him, and it was all her fault.
It's not a promise, he was her biggest mistake.

Creative in her own morbid ways,
She still thought of him often,
In ways that she dare not speak of,
Within the society they've become.

Jesus whispered to her once,
About her dreams of an artist,
Who would crash her into the wall,
Pin her up on her cross,
And leave her there to bleed,
Her sliced veins letting it all spill out in forgiveness,
Come back.
Come back!

At twelve she lost everything,
At sixteen, she has grown up too fast.
Yet she still held his transparent hand,
Being there for whatever lied ahead.
She sacrificed her soul for him,
By burning down all the bridges that would
Link her to her former self.

He saw her;
Vulnerable,
Easily intimidated.
Without ever thinking twice, he continiously numbed her,
And she readily recieved his injection of malicious venom everytime,
Which did nothing but drain the spirit she once had.
She became bitter to her friends and family,
But most of all,
Invisible to herself.
She lowerd her eyes,
Smudged black - dramatic -
And she lets herself get lost in a crowd,
Not wanting to be there.
For, it is much easier to disappear
Than to be found and saved.


All yearned aspirations to become someone
Get abandoned, leaving only eternal sorrow.
See, the problem was that he had killed her
With his looks of rejection and mixed messages.
But he gagged her anyway.
She tried so hard to run from the noose,
Only to later realize that there was no way to hide.
Cutting thoughts, thin wrists,
With the shame of evil intentions, a razorblade would glide.
And as she peeled the snowy leaves back,
She watched the tears leak from her vein.
Even in the depthless void of obscurity,
She could see the bloody fountain as it seeped crimson.
He was the reason why she gave birth to the new addiction,
Why she was left obsessed by many whimsical fantasies of violence to indulge in.

"But it will not last forever."

She finally learned to breathe on her own,
No longer being an extendable extension of his misery.
Reconstructing a person could be a long and difficult process,
And if there was one thing that she recovered from
The ashes of their once burning inferno,
It was the many pieces of her true heart.
She promised herself that it would never be a victim
Of his hunting games, of his leeches that liked to suck away her personality,
Ever again.
The weapon of choice was illusion.

She tried to cover up her scars,
But soon realized that she didnt have to hide.
She wont have to face this on her own.
She tilted her head toward Heaven,
And knew that he would understand.
God was her savior,
He made her regret taste like forgiveness.
She finally beame at peace with herself.
And she also realized that her mistake
Was the one thing that saved her.