Nothing

Im screaming out,
In my sleep,
In my tears.
Dreading each moment of life,
Pain controls all that I know,
All that I believe in,
And all that I need to survive.

Love is but a mere memory lost,
Somewhere in my mind.
Mistakes create regrets,
That I long to disperse.
Running into cold, deep dark shadows,
Looking for something,
But when I come out empty handed,
I realize I am nothing.

Words form numb sentences,
On a blank sheet of paper.
The circumstances I find myself in,
Hardly breeze through my head.
And if life is everything and nothing,
And words release only nothing,
And your self hate means nothing,
What is the point in living,
When you should just be nothing?