How to Tell if Your Child Is a Democrat

Your kid will be a Democrat if....

He boycotts the bakesale because it helps Corporate America.

She runs for class President, but demands a recount. When she fails the recount, she claims that the ballots of all the military kids don't count.

He refuses to attend English class because it may offend Hispanics.

She chains herself to her science teachers desk to protest the teaching of creationism with evolution in school. She demands that only evolution be taught.

He is impeached from the Student Council for having an affair with a fifth grader.

She claims racial profiling when given detention.

He refuses to say the Plege of Alliegance at the beggining of the school day.

She wrote a school paper on the evils of DDT.

He beat up a Christian in the hallways.

She converted to Islam the day after 9/11.

He wants to marry Barbara Streissand.

She wants to marry Michael Moore.

He refuses to wear anything made in Taiwan because it may anger the Chinese government.

She burns the Stars and Stripes in the streets.

He has nightmares about global warming.

She starts riots whenever a black man is arrested.

He thinks AIDS was created by the military in Area 51.

She thinks there is a global conspiracy by Corporations.