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Rated: E · Poetry · Emotional · #1299175
Trying to understand death
The morning sun slowly peeks it's head above apartment buildings
Making the feshly fallen snow glisten
My sister would have liked it
She'd want to see it
But today she rests in a peaceful slumber

There will be no more sleep overs
No more tears
No more laughter and joy

I think about her constantly
Imaging her lifeless body covered in black ash
Why God?
Why did you take my baby from me?
I never knew, never thought
In an instant my life was sent through another heart break
She can't be gone
She just can't be

There will be no more hugs or kisses
No more bad dreams
No more hurt

People shouldn't bury their children
It's not right
Tears flow like a river of never ending pain
She's always on my mind
I can't concentrate on anything
She's always right there
One day I wish I could make this all up to her
Maybe someday I will
God give me strength to keep walking the walk
Give me strength to love without fear
Give me strenth to over come this pain
I never got to tell her how sorry I am
I am
Everyone looks at me a little different
A little more aware
Everyone hovers
I scream inside so loud, so loud
My sister died
Wrapped in a cloud of smoke
Not knowing
Not breathing

There will be no more bed time stories
No more school
No more summers
I will never get to hug her
I will never get to kiss her
She will never ge the chance to get her drivers license
Never graduate
Never marry
Never have children

I don't want it to be true
I deny and deny and deny
I try to forget, forget the pain
So much pain
So much hurt
A little voice keeps saying
My sister died
My sister died
My sister died
All day, all night
I see her little face
Her blonde hair
And the way she always shone
I see her when I close my eyes
The sun right behind her
Wrapping her in warmth

There will be no more birthdays
No more christmas
No more cher

The thoughts never stop
I love her so much
I can't believe
Can't believe
Can't believe
Denail, the frist step in grieving
How are you? People ask
Fine, I reply
Fucked up
Insecure
Narotic
And emotinal
She ways always so happy
I remember the way she called my name
The way it felt to hug her
And I miss her so much
You never really know how much you love someone
How much they really matter in everyday life
Until it's to late
I should have been around more
Should have gone out with her
I should have just called to say hi and I love you
I feel gulity
There will never be a day that I don't think about her
I will always think of the things she would have liked
The things that made her happy
I will always remember her growing up
The way she smiled
I will always remember
I always thing the bad things can't happen to me
But they do

There will be no more easter egg hunts
No more silly games
No more swing sets where she'll swing

I make sure my smoke alarms work
I'm paranoid about fire
A fire killed my little sister
In the early morning
Before the sun peeked above the horizon
They say she tried to get up
Did it hurt?
Was she scared?
Did she cry out?
I wonder where she is now
All I know is she's not here
I believe her soul is in heaven
Looking down on us
I don't think she would have wanted us to cry
I miss her
Sometimes I think that she'll be home tomorrow
That she is just away for the weekend
I want to belive that so badly

There will be no more mornings spent together
No more nights spent together
No more fighting

Two days gone by so slowly
Every minute counting
I can't help but wonder
Who will be next?
Five days before Christmas
My little sister was taken from me
There will be very little holiday cheer this year
There will be little celebration
And a lot of tears
It's hard to think about getting up
Getting ready
Walking through each day
Trying to forget
And trying to remember
I love my sister
With all my heart
I know that she's in a better place now
Her soul is at peace
Above the city
Above the clouds
Above the entire plain of our existence
In a place where everything is better
My sister smiles
I'll see her again
Someday
But today, as the sun rises, and the day unfolds
I will keep her in my heart
In my prayers
Within me
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