Blank Pages

What about the pages,
The blank and empty pages
Of a blank and empty book
So intrigues the mind as not

To set a penpoint to one -
Not to drag that point across
And tear the page open
To bleed words and designs?

Bleed the pages until both
You and they are numb to the pain
Of the tearing, the ripping, and seeping
Of your convoluted brain.

So you and your blank and empty mind
Match your blank and empty black soul -
You remember? The one that you
Can't save with your black ballpoint pen.

When do you overcome the fear,
Loneliness keeps it fresh in fact
Until you can't keep your head or skin
And have to say you're suicidal

Again and again and again in your head -
Not to friends or families or strangers,
Just to yourself, your self, until
The doctor comes around again.