My Shield

What happened?
Everything used to be so easy
Nothing mattered
Numbness and indifferance
They were my minds escape
They rejected all emotion
Happiness engulfed me
Without notice
Those saviors vanished
Naked and naive
Abandoned me
Protectionless in this cruel world
Without my shield, I shiver
It's cold
It's painfull
For awhile it was exciting
Now I'm becoming unable
Trust has dissapeared
Everyone is unreliable
I feel it creeping back
Emotions are fleeting
Should I not be gratefull?
Tensely I await the return
Soon enough I will be safe again.