Letting Go

         

The cool night filtered past me with ever step I took. I could see my shadow stream across the ground as I walked. Lights from far off happy places twinkled promisingly, drawing the lonely and the weary into their garish embrace... I didn't want to be a part of it. I wanted my sorrow, if you will. I wanted to taste the pain of those memories, as the reality dawned on me that you can never go back. You can't relive the past. And the love and forgiveness you might've shared with someone in the cold month of December had disappeared with the season.

         "Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgiastic future that, year by year, recedes before us." I felt my lips forming the words. "It eluded us then, but that's no matter - tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther and one fine morning -"

         His deep, black eyes were closed in my mind. He smiled weakly - is it real? Is this heaven?

"So we beat on," his breath played across my features, before he kissed me one final time, "backs against the current..."

         "Borne ceaselessly into the past..."

Goodbye, Michael. My body shook and bit back tears. I had finally learned what it was like to let go.

My now black hair blew coolly back with the soft caress of the breeze.