THE DOOR

The Beginning
That day I went to school and something happened. Something that normally doesn't happen you know. I don't know why or how it happen it just did. You ask yourself why today, why me, why us, who made you like this? That went through my mind on that day. I was scared for my life. I cried like a baby in fear that I may not get to see you again. I may not get to taste the sweet and sour skittles. May not get to walk down the beach with my wife and feel the sand in between our toes and hearing the ocean waves go back and fourth. Why today, in fact why now. Who let it happen? Why did it happen? Who is out there? Behind that door to freedom?


         Today is January 15, 2008 and I woke up late today. As I am going to do the normal retune for school I'm running a little late. As I am running around to get in the shower, brush my teeth and getting dressed. I put my Jordan's on the wrong feet. Now you know I am in a hurry. After I sat down in my Dads favorite black chair covered with leather and fix my shoes I just stop and think. I enjoy the last few times I am running late to school because graduation is coming soon. The last few times I get to wake up and run to a bus to go to school and deal with teachers and stuff. After thinking for a little while I just became even more late. I am now sprinting a mile to the bus how great. Good thing I brought extra cloths today. I will change when I get to school. My name is Mike but everyone spells it as M.1.K.3. It's cool you know I don't really care. I just chill that's me. I made it to the bus by a few seconds with the sweet but salty sweat drips dropping from my face. You don't know how bad that tastes after you brush your teeth.
         I get on the yellow bus and take a seat it's like whatever when I get on. We all are doing our thing listen to the mp3's. As soon as we got the school we went to breakfast and had our daily meeting. It is around 6:50 am. Today I ate some powder eggs and a sausage with strawberry milk and apple juice. I drank my apple juice last so I don't have the taste of the milk on my breath. That sucks when you are talking to a girl and your breath smells like milk.  At seven o'clock on the dot we went to building twelve to copy the homework. Yes, so what like every student doesn't copy homework these days? So we copied math, from PR and Spanish from Louie. That's all we had last night so after that I was talking with Akon about his next deal with the business what hot beat he was going to play at the club tonight. This Friday we all were are going out to party. Next Monday is exams believe it or not. The last high school exams we will ever take. JJ and I are the hottest club runners around. We run the joins and that is how it goes. To say the least we let other crews run the club when we aren't around. The bell just rang to go to class so peace out guys.
         As I was walking to my class math PR and I are enjoying our last few walks. This is a wonderful time as we are walking to building 11 room 108 for the last few times. I turned and looked at PR and said,
"Dam man senior year already and we are about to be done."
He said "yea man I know where time went it was just yesterday we were in the cage enjoying being freshman."
         We got into the class and sat down at 7:31 am. It was a weird feeling today you know. As I was talking to PR across the room like normal making our loud conversations and making plans about what we are going to do this weekend with one another but since freshman year never happens because it's not even like that. It is just a big joke you have to be in on it to get it. Next, the teacher Mr. S said for us to shut up and so we did for a little bit. It just started up again until he said to shut up again. That happens all over again and again.
         At 7:45 we hear a loud beep. Principle Ketchup comes on and says Teachers and Students, Level III go off on the announcements and we all get scared. Level III means someone is on campus with a weapon. Not just any weapon but, a deadly weapon. The doors get locked and we get pushed out of sight. It just so happens that the person with a weapon is in Building 11 looking for an open classroom. The sweat dropping down my face knowing what could happen. I heard footsteps coming down the hallway because I was closest to the door. He came and stopped right there. He pulled and pulled the door but it would not budge. It was pretty strong. I hope. As I am sitting there scared trying not to make a sound I hear a shot fired that's 1, then 2 then 3. I am still scared for my life even more so then before. When we thought it was safe someone screamed there head off thinking of what could be going on outside. When she did that we heard that door again. Then we heard another shot and the door flung open.
         I heard, I seen, what I have never imagined before in my life on this day in January. The day was January 15, 2008 my 19th birthday. Will I get to see the club tonight? Will I get to see my family again? Will this guy shot me right here and right now? Time seems like it has just slowed down completely. Just utterly stopped upon us. Where is the second hand going the red second hand that we normally want to tick fast is just ticking really slowly? Tick, and Tick, and Tick, and Tick, and Tick, is all I hear as he is telling us to get down. Who was he who is he? Where did he come from? Why here, why today? What if I slept in today would I have been saved? Just imagine if I was not here today I could be off still sleeping and dreaming of nice things. As all of this is running through my mind I just can't believe only two minutes have gone by.
         I reached into my right pocket to grab my cell phone. My black and red cell phone with Air Jordan logo on it my jump man. When I was able to get my sweaty and unsteady hand on it he stopped me. What am I going to do? My heart is racing and pumping fast. I feel like it is going to pump right out of my body. He is looking at me like I am stupid. Which in fact just because I act stupid it doesn't mean I am. His face looks so familiar. I can't place it where his face is man I know him from somewhere. Where is he from as I am thinking hard in my head shouting to remember? PR looked over at me and said
"Remember the kid we made fun of back in middle school and elementary."
I said "um yea what about him......... oh shit"
PR said, "Yea that is him."
         Now that I know who is there standing there with a gun pointed to us I can put the pieces together. Why did we ever make fun of him is going in my mind. He was a nice kid that knew a great deal but why did I make fun of him. He just wanted some friends to hang out with. Damn man you never really look back at your acts until you are faced with a gun in your face. What was going through PR's mind? I mean that is my boy he has had my back since Pre-K when we both lived in Puerto Rico. I started to talk with the guy with the gun. It was a long conversation so I thought. It felt like we were there for hours on end. But, in reality we were only there for thirty minutes. His name was Jay.
         Jay was a very nice person.
"Jay, why are you holding us up?"
He replied saying "Because you made fun of me for the last time. Don't you remember what you said yesterday when I said hey. You said, what a homo and nigger suck my dick."

"No, I don't remember that at all Jay."

"Well you and PR were both there and you both started laughing and walked away with your freshest J's on and your Jordan shirts and The North Face bags. You are so into yourself you don't even know what you do anymore do you?"

"What are you talking about Jay? I just don't remember it all. Yea, I wear Jordan shoes and Shirts and shorts and North Face bags and what does that have to do with anything?"
He replied "You're a poser just like everyone else. You follow trends and no the beat of your own drum. Well I do I follow my own drum and this is what it is beating. To hold you up to put a cap in your ass along with PR."

That's when I said "but you Jay, then you will be a poser for everyone else that has held up a school and killed people." Not the smartest thing to say at the moment but hey I'm Mike you have to cut me some slack.

He loudly replied "How about this nigger you suck my dick how about that. Do it get on your knees and beg for your life."

Now why would I do that come on now.... "Hello, not happening in these Jordan's I just got them."

He said "Do it or I will shot you. I want you to know how it feels to be made fun of or told what to do now do it."

I looked at my boy PR and he looked at me and I said "hell no I'm so not doing that."
And that is when I jumped down for my life. I fell to the ground. PR Followed and so did the rest of the other students in the room. We all fell down. Why, did we do this because he shot a round. He missed though but, he shot. He would never shot me.
         
I hope you know I missed on purpose. What is to say next time I won't get your face. You deserve what I give you.
I did not say anything I was speechless. I am not going to try him how. Damn man I hurt somebody that bad. How can I do that? Why did I do that?
My girl Nikki is telling me to shut up so we all can get out of this home free. That is she will shot me herself to get her freedom.
Man what a trader I thought. Hold on guys we all need to stay calm and relax. I yelled.
         Jay yelled "Relax my ass; Nobody is getting out until we settle this."
That is when I started to take him seriously. I can't believe what is going on really. We have been at this for a while now. Where are the police? Where are they?
"Why did you pick this day January 15, 2008 to come and find me? When you could have picked any other day of the year?"
He replied saying "Because it is your 19th birthday nigger your mine today. Aren't you I could let you live or I could let you die today right now? Your life hangs in my balance."
I could not say anything because it was true my life was in his balance. He decides who walks out of here alive or in a body bag.

         What a way to spend my 19th birthday don't you think. Damn man so let's talk Jay. Let's talk about what is going on and how we can work this out. By this time it has been 4 hours we have been locked up here. Nikki is telling me to shut up before I get capped but I told her to shut up too. I was like let's have circle time. Dam I just got to be sarcastic now don't I. My mouth gets me into a lot of trouble it really does.

         So we really did get into a big circle the whole class. There were two people currently absent from the class and our circle. The two people are the teacher and one student. They left about thirty minutes ago. Why you ask well because he shot the teacher. This is how it went down.

         When he walked into the room Mr. S. tried to protect us. He was wrestling the guy for the gun. Sweat drops falling from his face faster then you can say what are you doing five times. I thought why he is doing that? He let the student go because she was having a panic attack. He thought a good twenty minutes about this. If he should let them go. Why should he let them go? Are there lives worth sparing for the rest of us? Nikki is the master of talking next to me. She was able to get him to let them go. Now if only she could do that for me. Like come on now. Think use that brain you say you have. PR and I sat down into the circle and we were thinking you know we could tell what was on one another's mind.


The Circle
Where
         As we are in the circle this is what is going on. There are a total of 23 of us today in the room currently. Today was the day we wear the hottest shit to class because we are going out tonight. Tonight to party it was going to be hot. We might not make it. My phone keeps ringing but I can't answer it. It is my mother calling to find out if we are okay. I said can we turn on the news and He said yea turn it on. We were watching the news and it said breaking news high school on lock down due to shooting on the campus. Yep that is us. We are on there.

         We all got worried about what is going to happen. We are sitting there and Mrs. Nikki aka Dr. Phil now is talking to us like there is something wrong wit us. When in fact she was just trying to get herself out of this situation we know that. But, she was trying hard and I was just being a dumb ass just doing what I do.
Nikki was talking to him to try to calm him down and get him to let her go or to let everyone go this is sort of how it went.
She was saying "this isn't really what you want. If you shot anymore people what is going to happen you will go to jail for life."
He replied "yes I do. Do you even know my name before today? Do you how many times I have liked you Nikki. When I tired to talk to you what did you do? You and Josie and Kaitlyn just went off and blew me off like nothing. With Josie turning around to M.1.K.3 and PR saying if you're a virgin I'm a Hoe. Which we all know M.1.K.3 is not a virgin and Josie might be a hoe.

The Feelings
About thirty minutes went by before anyone really opened up. It was a short thirty minutes. As life is moving on slow and fast for us we really do not realize how one little mistake or one little choice can change a person's life as we know it. I really never had to choose anything in life. Things got chosen by the crew or by the family. Now looking back I should have chosen some more things by myself. All the stupid things I have done like I did to this nigga. It is like how I could have done that.
         
         Nikki was next to open up. She was crying about how she made one bad choice in life and she got a baby for it. She decided to open up and life went all down hill. She didn't now if her baby was going to stay for a long time. The doctors say when the boy comes out he might only live for a few minutes to a few hours. Life is about making the choice to try or not. Because what if she doesn't try with the baby then she will never know the outcome.
         
         Josie opened up next and started to talk about how her parents weren't always there for her. How they are always busy with working two or more jobs that she is left alone to take care of the house and the cooking and cleaning. That's a great deal for a sixteen year old girl to do. With just the stress of high school and boys and life in general to have to be an adult and take care of the crib like that.

         The class was just opening up one by one. The news was calling us "THE UNLUCKY SIX." There were six of us left inside the class at this point. It is only 8 P.M. Man was I Hungry. The only thing I had today was the breakfast which is nasty as hell anyways.
         P.R. was next. He was very emotional next. He said how he loved his ex girlfriend that he couldn't be with because of their families. How his pops left him as a little kid and for him to take care of his mother and his brother and sister all by himself. He had to grow up when he was 10 years old. Taking the role of Son, parent, brother something a lot of people see now days. I never saw that side of P.R. He is my boy and all but he never told me all of this. I am kind of mad at myself for not knowing. He still and always will be my right hand man.
         
         Things have got to change when we get out of here man. I feel like wanting to renew life. To go back and make major changes to life as we know it. It hurts to see what we can cause and not even know it.
         Jay's turn was next. I couldn't believe what he was telling us. How he never fitted in since his parents got divorced and how his father killed himself. I wanted to cry at that moment. Jay was more then just the shooter he was a victim but, a Victim to what? Well to me and P.R. for starters. Next he was a victim to life and it just hurts to be standing in front of him knowing that he is here so he can show people who he is. It never had to come to this it really didn't. We as high school students let it come to this. His mother blames him for everything that goes on in her life. He had the marks to prove it. What really hurt me the most that just sent me in tears was the scare on his back. That day she tired to stab him. You couldn't miss that stab wound if you tired. To hear and see all of this it hurts. I started to cry and gave him a hug and said NO HOMO.
         Around this time it is 10 P.M. and we have been here since 7:30 am. It hurts to realize can you change someone in a day. Can you change someone's life in an hour? Can you do it with one story? Believe it you can. Because, I am starting to change the ways and its only been a few hours. I guess it takes a guy with a gun in a school to do it. I told Jay let us end this now.          
         He finally said okay and we took the gun and cleaned it. Then we all switched cloths and walked out of that school that night. I ran over to my Moms and Pops and said I LOVE YOU and really meant it this time. The colors of this life finally came together. We all had one voice that day. We had one heart. We all became one that day. Jay wasn't seen by the police and they asked us who the shooter was and we said we don't know he disappeared when the injuries left. He told us to not come out until 10:30 pm. The cops took that story because they had to. There is nothing to pin it onto someone.


         As a few days went on things went back to normal. Life resumed as we sit in classes and talked and laughed. We praised our Jordan's and Air Forces and Puma's. We talked about where the next hottest party was at and the regular things of high school. Graduation was one day away. Everyone in that classroom that day was going to walk across that stage. Where did Jay go? Well Jay stayed him and P.R. and I all became closer that day. We have chilled since that day. Nikki had her baby it is a boy. His name is Jayson. Josie turned out to be a hoe after all even though I am not a virgin pretty funny. Life got changed that day. Was it for the better? Why did we as humans let it get to this point? No one should be made fun of for what they wear, how they look. It shouldn't be a fashion statement to go to school. Forget the Shoes, the hats, the crews, and the drama. Go to have fun. Go to date people. Go to get your education and become a member of Society. From that day that is what I have done. I am in my early thirties. Jay and I still talk to this day. P.R. and I are still cool. Nikki, is a wonderful mother and has a wonderful husband that I approved of course. As for Josie there were two endings to her story first she caught an STD and then second, she had 3 kids with the same guy. They found her cure for her type of STD so that's all good. Kaitlyn, she became a famous short model and she's hitting the streets by storm.


         Why this is named The Door. Well because, it represents that in high school we open one door freshman year and close it. We pick our friends start our crews and stay with them as much as possible. When someone tires to join and they don't look like us or act like us we reject them. Just open up the door to everyone and freedom will be let LOOSE. TRY IT ONE DAY AND YOU WILL SEE.