Morbid Distraction

Our family has been uncouth in its eating habits for far too many years. At the present time my father is tormenting me with the thought crushing sounds he manifests with his raisin bran, bowl, and spoon. He believes there are too many raisins in the cereal, and he pounds his bowl with a sharp and frequent clatter, as he pushes them to the side. My mother could roast a chicken and consume the entire thing in an explosive mass of slurping and sucking that left her face glistening.

My sister simply picks at her food with her fingers and licks them constantly.

I have been told that I tend to eat a bit fast.