Unsaid

                    Rachel lifted the note from her back pocket and turned towards Jake's locker. She suddenly stopped mid-step; something was holding her back. She looked around but couldn't understand why her hand would not let go of the note.

         Rachel had begun working at the Hanesville Grocery when she was sixteen. The pay was good and people were nice. During the first week she trained on the register and met the main group of coworkers she would come to know as friends. On her third day, she met Jake. He walked in the break room as Rachel was signing on for her shift. He had short brown hair and intensely dark green eyes. "Hi" Jake said. "Umm, Hi...” Rachel replied nervously. Jake smiled and closed his locker. “You must be the new cashier. Good Luck.” Rachel smiled back and nodded. “Thanks.” Jake left the break room. Rachel stood for a moment, dazed by Jake’s kindness and his beautiful green eyes. She knew she had fallen for him and it drove her crazy.
         Boys never interested Rachel. When she was young, a group of boys had been mean and constantly picked on her. They never seemed to leave Rachel alone, taunting her when she tried to ignore their remarks. She had always sworn against liking guys because of her past, always afraid they would be as mean and cold-hearted as the boys in grade school. Jake however, was different. She could feel it.
         But Rachel was not even sure if Jake really paid attention to her. There were little things- sharing candy on break, comparing music tastes- which were surprisingly similar, and the occasional shared joke. She wanted badly to confess her feelings for Jake but wouldn’t tell him in fear of rejection. So Rachel kept everything inside, bubbling up every time she saw him.
         When Rachel turned eighteen, she decided to switch jobs. She wanted to work at the bookstore close to home. She had always loved books. They were her escape from the real world. The owners had known her since she could read; their bookstore was like her second home. Rachel applied and immediately got the job. She put her two weeks notice in at the Grocery store and told her friends she was leaving. She had planned to tell Jake separately to see his reaction, thinking she could find out how he felt by his expression to the news. But Rachel could never get Jake alone to tell him.
         Before her last day of work at the grocery store, Rachel wrote a note to Jake. She told him everything about how she’d felt and gave him her number.
         
                   Jake-

         Since I’d started working at the grocery store, I have come to realize that I like you. Since I may never see you again I felt it was time to finally tell you what I’ve been feeling. If you ever want to talk, my number is 554-2348.
                   
                   - Rachel

She smiled at the thought of finally telling Jake her feelings. She placed the note in her back pocket and went to work at the Grocery store for the last time.
         Rachel watched the clock intently, waiting for her shift to end so she could put the note in Jake’s locker. She knew he wasn’t working that day but would be tomorrow morning. “Rachel, you can go.” Those words had never meant as much as they did that day. She counted down as quickly as she could and raced to the break room. When she opened the break room door, Colin sat at the table reading the latest newsletter. Colin was Jake’s friend and stocking partner at work, Rachel knew if he watched her put the note in Jake’s locker he would read the note. Rachel smiled and signed out from her shift, then grabbed her purse and ran in the women’s restroom. 
         She plopped her purse onto the counter and turned on the faucet. She ran her fingers under the cool water and splashed her face a few times, trying to get a grip on herself. She was having second thoughts about the note and she definitely couldn’t put it in Jake’s locker while Colin sat there and watched. She grabbed the paper towel out of the container, dried her face and hands, and stood looking in the mirror for a few seconds. She heard footsteps outside the door and figured they must be Colin’s. Rachel pulled her purse off the counter and ran into the now unoccupied break room.
         As she stood, holding the note in her hand, Rachel’s mind raced with thoughts. Scenes played through her head of what would happen when Jake found the note.
         At first the imagined scene was happy. Jake found her note and called her that night when he finished work. They talked for hours and started dating. 
         But a second scenario came to mind that scared Rachel. Jake found the note, as before, but this time he told Colin and his other friends at work. They started talking about Rachel and laughing. They called Rachel’s number and left a fake message from Jake saying to meet him at the coffee shop in town. Rachel was at the coffee shop and Jake never showed up. She turned to leave and saw Colin and Jake drive away laughing.
         Rachel stopped mid-step and stood motionless. “Jake wouldn’t do that,” she thought, “But still, what if he did?”
She didn’t know what to do. Her emotions were running on hiatus. She didn’t move for what seemed like hours, and finally made her decision.
         Rachel looked around the break room once more. Then she slid the note into her pocket and left the break room for the last time.
         Some things are better left unsaid.