Another Day in the Life of...

Another Day in the Life of Cyborg Tuna Melt Stanley



“Who turned out them lights!?” Arnold’s hoot penetrated deeeeep into the night.

“It’s just me.”

“Oh, thank the lordy! I thought it was a disembodied evil spirit bent on some blood crunching, sickening revenge!”

“Oh goodness no. I’m just here to pick up the trash.”

“Okay then! …wait. I RECYCLE!” but his screams went unheard as the creature slowly tore him into pieces with its razored teeth.



Paul threw the paper back onto Jeremy’s desk, “Dude, that’s disgusting. Screw you and your values.”

“And THIS class is an example of a frame story, I hope you were all listening,” Ms. Chavez exerted with special "oomph" towards Paul and Jeremy. They bowed their heads in respectful defeat to their wise elder.

Only three more hours. Only three more hours and that stupid bell would release the stupid class to their stupid houses where they could continue being stupid. Heh, everyone is so stupid. So stupid. Heh.

Schreeeech! Wailed a set of failing brakes outside; tension filled the room. Not a soul breathed, waiting for the crunch of metal devouring metal. The room sat in a purgatory-like state, the split second during a gasp when time stops.
…
nothing.

“Maaannn, I wanted to see a wreck peanutz.” Holla’d Taeshaun.

“Naw folk. Das ignent.” Reprimanded Ms. Chavez, Taeshaun bowed in honorable defeat.

“Anything I write comes true!” Interjected Jeremy with a toothy grin, his tone of voice was somewhat different. Despite the fact that the room was well lit a shadow somehow shrouded his face; and something trickled off his face onto the desk, spreading into dark spots on his paper.

“Dude, you crying? You’re such a wimp, time to take your medicine.” Paul said, warming up his guns with an impressive flex.

Jeremy wiped the blood seeping from his eyes and freakishly crawled to the wall, leaning over backwards he smeared a terrifying lymric onto the wall with his own blood:


Tonight only, the fabulous Blues Brothers. Rhythm and Blues review. The Palace Hotel Ballroom. Route 16. Lake Wazzapamani. The fabulous Blues Brothers show and review.

He then snapped his own head off, spewing blood all over the classroom. It would have been absolute mayhem, unparalleled, and untamable pure hysteria-- that is if the bell hadn’t already rung. Nice try Jeremy. Attention whore.