Wings

Wings

      I write this now, quickly, before I leave. Steffi is here beside me and I can speak openly about all that has passed. A great injustice was done to both of us, but that’s all in the past. As for the future, well, who can say?
              I sign myself, sincerely,
                                Carli Lancaster
*                                                                                                                      *
      It had always been the three of us, for as long as I can remember. Father, Steffi and I. Mother died bringing Steffi into this world. I guess we were a normal family. I did very well at school, getting A’s and award after award. Steffi did quite badly. I mean, she got along with everyone, but she didn’t get good grades.
      There was roughly a year between us, and I was the elder. Steffi trusted me with everything and she used to tell me about a dream she kept having. Dreams full of mystery and magic, colours and light, but they were difficult for her to explain, and I guess I never really understood them. I just thought that it was a young girl’s over active imagination, until one day Steffi described her new teacher to me. She said, “She’s really nice! Tall, with dark hair and wings.”
I thought I’d misheard, and I asked, “Wings?”
She gave me a dirty look. “Yeah. Y’know, big, white, feathery things?” I nodded, but secretly I wondered if Steffi was playing some kind of joke on me.
      The next week I made an excuse to visit Steffi in her class. Her teacher was tall and had dark hair but there was no sign of any wings. I asked Steffi about it and she told me that none of her friends could see them either. Call me crazy, but I was starting to believe her. She didn’t look – or sound – like she was lying.
      I heard no more about wings, of any kind, from Steffi, but her dreams persisted. Near Christmas, I heard her tell father about the wings, and a few days later he came into my room to ask me about it.
      “Has your sister been spinning you some silly nonsense about wings?” He looked very disapproving and I knew for sure that he’d never believe Steffi.
“Well, yes, but, well…” I didn’t know how to voice my suspicions that she might not be lying. “What if there’s something in it, what if…?”
“What if you sister is gifted, special? What if she has second sight? I doubt it. Listen to me, Carli! I don’t want you encouraging your sister in this. She needs to grow up and grow out of this attention seeking! That won’t happen if she has you swallowing her every word!”
He left the room. I knew he didn’t mean to be harsh; he just couldn’t bring himself to believe Steffi. I could hear her crying in the next room, but couldn’t move to go comfort her.
      For the next six months or so, Steffi distanced herself from me, from father, from everyone. I heard nothing from her about wings, dreams or anything else. We simply didn’t talk.
      Then, the inevitable happened. Father married again. A nice, warm, friendly woman called Martha. I had no problem with this – after all, I had barely known my mother. Steffi didn’t mind Martha either, but there was one problem – she had wings! Steffi couldn’t even look at her without being reminded of her abnormality. She started acting really strange. She would lock herself in her room for days, refusing to eat. Or she would come out of her room but absolutely refuse to speak to anyone.
      Father was still as unshakeable as ever where the wings were concerned. Martha was more sympathetic, and she helped me comfort Steffi, but I could tell that she didn’t believe her – although she tried.
      A month after father and Martha’s first wedding anniversary, father put Steffi in a mental institution. It was a shock to all of us. For a while Steffi had been rather unpredictable and wild, but nothing she did warranted this, at least not in the eyes of myself and Martha. We tried to reason with him, but he was as unmoveable as ever. I was allowed to visit Steffi in the institute, but I found it very distressing. Steffi was twitchy and nervous. She told me about the other people there, and how they scared her. It upset me so badly, that, after a while, father stopped me from visiting her.
      Six months later, Steffi went missing. I never saw her again until now. The strange thing was that, left in her room, when the police searched it, were three long, white feathers.
*                                                                                                                      *
      Up until this point, this could be the story of almost any family, but the major twist is yet to come.
      A few months after Steffi went missing, I got the shock of my life. I began to see the wings. At first, it was just glimpses, like tricks of the light, gone whenever I looked closely. I often wondered if that was how Steffi started seeing them.
      I confided in Martha and she was very sympathetic. I never told her that she had wings, though. She eventually told my father, and he “had words” with me. At the time I was furious with her for telling him, but I understand now, she felt she had no choice.
      Father decided that the best thing to do would be to put me in the same institution that Steffi had been put in, before my behaviour took the same downward turn hers had. I was, and still am, unbelievably angry about this. To me, it seemed that, both daughters seeing this should prove that it was true, but apparently my father did not see it this way.
      I sincerely hope that you never know how hellish it is to be a sane person stuck in a mental institution! I don’t exaggerate when I say that every one of the employees there had wings. And they needed them too! The scariest thing was when you are talking to someone and they seem perfectly sane, but then a few days or hours or even minutes later they take a ‘bad turn’. It’s terrifying when they explode or try to attack someone, but -to me – the scariest person wasn’t like that. He was silent, never said a word to anyone, he had dreadful eyes. They looked as if they has seen and done awful things. I felt that he wouldn’t have hurt or even kill me or anyone else.
      Finally I reach the climax of my tale. After I had been in the mental home for a month, I began dreaming about Steffi. Memories of her mostly. One night I woke up and I was sure I could see her in my room.
      I truly thought I was crazy now, until one evening when Steffi did appear outside my window. “I won’t leave you here. I promise.” She whispered.
“Thank you,” I replied, with as much gratitude as I could muster. “And Steffi, I’m so sorry father put you in here…” But she was gone.
      It was true, though. Now that I truly knew how Steffi had felt, being cooped up here, I felt twice as awful at my playing a part in it.
      It wasn’t until after she had gone that I realised that she had wings. I had gotten so used to seeing them that I didn’t pay any attention. I walked over to the mirror. I was pale and shaking, but to my greatest surprise, I had wings! What had I done to deserve them? I figured wings were for good people – so why did I have them?
      About an hour later, Steffi reappeared outside my window. She placed her hand against the glass and it disappeared, much to my surprise. She greeted me in whispers, refusing to tell me where she’d been for the past months. She bade me write this history, and I’ve spent the last hour writing it. As I wrote previously, I know nothing of what the future will hold, and Steffi will tell me even less. She says we are going home, not to where we lived before, but to our true home, and refuses to blame me for her being put in the institution. She seems far too calm and peaceful to have thoughts of revenge, and I will trust her. I live in hope that our home is better than this place.
*                                                                                                                      *
      Carli put down her pen and stood up. “Well, Steffi? Where do we go from here?”
Steffi smiled in answer. “That would ruin the surprise.”
Carli reached out a hand to her sister.
      Taking it, Steffi climbed through the glassless window, and out into the golden light of morning.